Isabella is that you?
by Am Sadi
Summary: Now 14 Isabella had changed her outward appearance, drastically, and now has to confront feelings for Phineas after not seeing him for three years, after several incidents they try to work things out, but there seems to be trouble at every turn. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

(Isabella PoV)

She stood there in her simple black underwear, looking at the cloths lying on the bed. None of them were what the boy had been used to. Once he started going to that new private school, and left everyone behind. Though she knew it wasn't personal, he wasn't too bright when it came to matters of people, ideas and inventions that was where he exceled. She let her eyes scan across the clothing that she had again. Black or dark, that's what became of the bright sunny girl from across the street. She wouldn't even be here trying to decide, if her mother hadn't told her that she had to go over there for some party or something. Stupid.

Once she realized that he wouldn't ever see her as anything other than the girl across the street, she turned into her self. At first, she just stopped going over there. Then her friends, or the ones that used to be her friends kept poking and prodding her trying to figure out why she never went over to help Phineas. Well most of her friends had gone. There was Gretchen, her and Gretchen still had the same views, no one cared. Ever cared beyond what they wanted.

Isabella stood looking out her window, across the street to the place where she had gone so many times, but not anymore. There he was, Phineas the boy to whom her heart used to flutter from the sheer sight of him. Now the sight of him only left it aching, breaking. She tried so many times to get him to just notice her, to notice how she felt. It wasn't that she was shy, she made it obvious how she felt. Everyone knew it, everyone except the one that she wanted to know. How long had it been since she even bothered to go over there?

Three years…? She was fourteen now, so yeah three years. Has it really been that long? Yeah it has been three years since she had even bothered going across the street to her neighbor's house, where the most marvelous things had been constructed. Wonder and amazement, but never what she wanted, never what she was looking for. Phineas… how long had it been since she even thought about his name? Since the last time she saw him, a couple months ago. Ever since he started going to that private school, she had hardly seen him or his brother Ferb. Her friends? Longer. She decided to leave the Fireside Girls long ago, all but of course Gretchen. She had decided, what was the point in collecting stupid patches, when what she really wanted was so far out of reach?

She decided that she didn't need to impress him anymore, she didn't need the frustrations. Her life had become less complicated when she stopped fawning over him, didn't it? Didn't it, she asked herself and got no reply. Yes it did, she decided to answer, though she really didn't believe it. At least it would only be one day, one party she had to attend. She pulled a black skirt up her legs and over the slender hips that had developed since she had last seen him, pulled a black shirt over her head, with white print on the front, which simply said, "Who cares?" a stab at the boy who she had loved and had ignored her. The party was for him anyways wasn't it, so why should she care? He never had.

She finished it off with the makeup she normally wore whenever she went out, nothing special. She started with the eyeliner, and then finished with the black lipstick. She wished she could wear more, but it didn't complement her skin tone too well. She grabbed a box out of her closet, to put the gift her mother had bought so she'd have something to give him. When told about the party, she said she didn't want to buy anything for him. That she didn't know what he'd want. Then stated, that he wouldn't even notice if she brought one, wouldn't even notice if she was there at all. Another failed attempt at getting out of going. Her only reason for forcing herself to go, was that Gretchen would be there too, against her will. And at least she'd have someone to talk to. She looked in the mirror that used to be outlined in pictures of her and her friends, and Phineas. Black clothing, no bow. She liked how she looked, thought it was an improvement over the weak person she once was. Let's get this over with, she said to herself.

"See you over there, mija" her mother called after her as she walked out, she didn't reply just continued walking. She saw others arriving, some of her old Fireside friends, who looked at her. Mouths agape, they went to different schools so they hadn't seen her in a long time, and had long since stopped coming over.

"I don't care what you think." The words came out her mouth just as easy as breathing as she passed them, and their shocked faces. She continued on, leaving the girls to stare after her.

Just through the gate, she said to herself, you can do this Isabella don't let them see you hesitate. She walked into the backyard looking around. There was Buford, at least he looked cleaner than he used to. Baljeet standing next to Buford, as was always. She hadn't expected that friendship to last, maybe there was more than she saw, not that she really cared much. Ginger was standing next to Baljeet, maybe they had become a couple in her absence. Her former friends from the front had come in, Milly, Addison, and Holly. Candace was talking to Katie, another of her former Fireside Girl friends. Ferb, was just standing around not really doing much. No Gretchen… great now what. She placed the box on the table next to the rest and made her way to the tree that stood in the back yard, leaning against it.

Phineas wasn't out here yet either, maybe she could just say something to him, give him her gift, and leave. Technically that was going to the party, right?

"Who is that?" she heard Candace ask Katie and the other Fireside Girls, she knew they were looking at her. She turned her head and glanced at them from the corner of her eyes, yeah Candace was looking right at her.

"That's Isabella," Milly said, the mousy haired girl, replied in a shushed tone.

"Yeah, I haven't seen her since she left the Fireside Girls." One of them said, they all nodded in agreement.

"None of you have talked to her in years?" Candace folded her arms over he chest looking at the girls. When they all just stared back, Candace started coming towards her. Isabella pushed herself off the tree, and started towards the gate that would lead her back home, "Isabella!" Candace called.

She stopped, counted to ten. Why was she so angry? Candace never did anything to her, she was hyper, and always trying to bust the boys, but she listened. When she had calmed down enough. She turned to Candace, "Hey Candace."

"Haven't seen you in a while," Isabella only shrugged, and then looked back to her former friends. Ginger and her sister Stacy had shown up. Stacy like Candace had filled out. Isabella didn't have that issue, she started to curve at about twelve or so, she didn't remember. She didn't care.

"It happens, look I left the gift for Phineas on the table, for whatever this is, I'm gonna go." Isabella said flatly, and then was stopped by Ginger.

"Hey Isabella." She said, Isabella just stared at her a moment, when it seemed that Ginger wouldn't move.

"Hey Ginger, long time… I gotta go." Isabella said with equal flatness as before. No emotion, no hint about how each moment she stayed in this yard was another moment closer to Phineas arriving.

"You're not going to tell Phineas Happy Birthday?" Stacy had said somewhere over her shoulder." It was Phineas' birthday, at one point she would have remembered, would have counted down the days. But she didn't anymore… obviously the look on her face said everything.

"You forgot? You?" Ginger looked shocked, Isabella scoffed and put as much bite in her voice as she could muster.

"I'm not his keeper. Now if you'll…" she started, but a voice interrupted her. No… not that voice. Not him, not now, she was so close to the gate.

"Isabella?" it was Phineas, so he did notice she was here. Big surprise. She turned to look at him, he was walking up, and she watched him come closer from between Stacy and Candace. "I haven't seen you in…"

"I left your gift on the table, I-I have to go." Isabella turned, feelings that she hadn't felt in years was surging through her, and something was building to an explosion. Feelings she couldn't… wouldn't allow to start again. She wouldn't let those feeling tear her apart anymore. She walked past them, past the others coming in that she didn't remember. Phineas was calling for her, she noticed that no one else was talking anymore, everyone now watched her. She stopped, turned and looked back at Phineas. She wasn't sure what her face looked like, but Stacy and Candace took a step back. "No." her voice wasn't flat, it had bite in it. "I-I… For years…" she couldn't get her mind to form the words she wanted to yell at him.

Phineas just stared at her waiting, along with everyone else, though all she could see was Candace, Stacy, Ginger and of course Phineas. How long had they waited for this show down? "You ignored how I felt… you were too blind to see it and now I'm supposed to care? No, it doesn't work that way." That something that was building inside got bigger. She didn't yell, she didn't need to, she voice was low, but was sure everyone heard. When did her heart start beating faster? When did the tears start, messing up her makeup? When did she allow these feelings of hurt and rejection back? Then she whispered, "I hadn't felt… damn you Phineas." From the looks on the faces around her, she was sure only the four closest to her heard it. Then she smiled, she knew it looked fake, "Happy Birthday."

She turned and walked out the gate, across the lawn. No talking behind her, no laughing like she expected. No damning words, nothing. She expected something, someone to tell her she couldn't say what she said, or to run out to her. But nothing, maybe she was right, they all wanted to just ignore her, and she just made it easier. She made it to the sidewalk, when it all hit her again. Those feelings building up, looking for an escape, she slipped and fell to her knees which luckily hit the grass before the sidewalk. She needed to go, she couldn't… too late. It erupted, surging from her stomach, to her heart, to her throat, she screamed. The sound was full of anger and frustration drowned in sadness.

She had to go, she couldn't wait here they couldn't see her like this. She couldn't allow it, not after all this time. Damn her mother for making her go, damn Phineas for making her feel like this. Damn herself for letting her break down. Voices surrounded her, hands grabbing at her which she shook off, and failed to get back to her feet, leaving her to just lean against the ground. All those voiced reverberated off her at once.

"Isabella?" "Are you alright?" "What happened?" "What's wrong?" "Is she hurt?"

"Leave. Me. Alone. " Her voice was flat, she wanted them all to leave her alone. She just wanted to go home and forget all about these feelings, lock them back in their box.

"No. I won't." she swung her head towards the voice that told her 'no'. It was Phineas kneeling beside her, it was his hands that was grabbing her.

"I-I have to…" tears burned her eyes as she stared at him. She had always wanted him to look at her like that, with compassion, and care. But it just broke her more. Too late, she said in her mind, that girl is gone now. Dead. She pushed him off her. She was letting these feelings get the better of her. Not this time, she refused. She managed to get to her feet, and stumbled due to blurry vision, and fell again. Everything went black.

More voices around her, concerned voices, and reassuring voices. At first she thought she was in a room, until it moved, she moved. Then someone was yelling to be careful. She opened her eyes, everything was blurry, her head hurt. She moved her hand up to her head, something warm smeared across her hand. She pulled it back looking at it, red. Her vision was blurry, but she didn't have any problem figuring out she fell head first on the sidewalk. But who was with her? She turned her head, it was Mrs. Fletcher in the passenger seat, Okay not so bad, Candace was driving… alright. By her feet was her mother. She looked up, but she couldn't keep her eyes open long enough to see who was above her.

When she awoke again, there were more voices, explaining that the stitches would have to come out in about a week. More hushed talking, she heard footsteps, and then heard her mother asking someone in the room to wait with her, she assumed she was 'her', while she went out to talk with the doctor.

"You're awake." A voice said, she knew the voice, and she kept her eyes closed. The voice belonged to the one person she didn't want to talk to at the moment… moment… she didn't want to talk to him, period. She pretended that she was still sleeping. "I noticed your breathing changed, Isabella you're awake."

She should have known he would be too smart to fall for that. He was smart about people in that way, but feelings… he was an idiot. "What?"

"Are you alright?" How could he dare ask that… oh her head, yeah that made sense. She didn't think that he would pick now to become apparent to her feelings, or former feelings. Then again she did just tell him…

"My head is fine." Straight and to the point, she kept her eyes closed, she didn't want to see him. She wondered if her makeup was still running on her face or if someone had cleaned it.

"That's not what I meant Isabella, and you know it." His voice was stern yet filled with concern. Wonderful time to see how others are feeling, when they have to tell you straight out. What an idiot.

"I'll be fine when… when…" when would she be fine? When she was able to lock all that crap away? When she was able to get away from him? When the world opened up and swallowed her? Obviously the last one wasn't ready, her head just bounced off it right now. "I'll be fine."

"I didn't… I didn't know." He said, he sounded truthful… of course he was being truthful he never had lied before, why should he now?

"You are an idiot." She kept her voice low, hoping her mother wouldn't hear her, she didn't want to be yelled at on top of everything. She had made a pretty big scene, maybe now she'll realize she shouldn't have pushed her to go when she obviously had reasons for not wanting to go.

"Yeah I guess so." He said, she heard rustling paper being ripped open. She opened her eyes a little to see that he was opening the gift that she brought. Obviously he noticed she was looking, or at least was paying attention, "Candace brought your gift here after going back to get a change of cloths for you."

Cloths for… she realized she was wearing what all patients wore a gown, and nothing else. How long had she been asleep? She knew head injuries required x-rays, she had gotten stitches obviously, couple hours she guessed. "Aren't you supposed to see if I have memory loss?"

"Well do you?" he had stopped opening his gift, looking at her. Idiot, he is a complete idiot. "Oh well never mind that was a stupid… never mind."

"Idiot." she huffed, and found that as long as she didn't look at him, she could talk to him without her heart racing. Without those feelings rearing its ugly head.

"So... uhm nice new look." He seemed to be trying to make small talk, she'd fix that awkwardness.

"You know you don't have to talk to me. I did ruin your party." Why did she even care if she ruined his party, he ruined her emotions. Stupid idiot.

"So? You know… maybe you don't. But I hadn't had a birthday party since you stopped coming over. Only reason why I agreed to this year was because mom said you were going to come." The rustling again, he obviously wanted to know what her mother got him. Should she mention that she didn't buy the gift… maybe if he didn't like it she would tell him who bought it. Her eyes opened, and she stared at the box. Her eyes widened, that wasn't the box with the gift her mother bought, that was the box that she had put something she made for Phineas' birthday a long time ago.

"No wait. That's the wrong…" but he had already opened it. She lunged off the bed, and landed on him, the chair he was in obviously not designed for this, toppled back and they both ended up on the floor. "No give that here, that's not…" too late, she told herself as he held the book in his hands. Why did she keep that? Because until now she didn't even remember she had it. She righted herself and got back onto the bed, sitting now though.

"It says 'Happy Birthday Phineas' on it. But it's not mine?" he looked confused, and she looked mortified. And she shook her head.

"No that's from, before. It's mine, so… give it back." She held out her hand, he just opened it and turned the pages. He used to listen to me, now he was like everyone else. No one paid much attention to her. She watched as he flipped through the book, of bad drawings, and pictures she had written around. A confession of her love in a book she planned on giving him. Then she gave up and packed the book away along with all her emotions. She wanted to leave, she wanted him to go.

"Why didn't you give this to me before Isabella?" she looked at him, just stared at him. How was she supposed to have given it to him, when its meaning would have been wasted on an idiot? "Maybe…"

"Maybe? No, if I had given it to you then, you'd have been as clueless as always." She folded her arms over her chest, ick the robe was pink. Her once favorite color had easily become her most hated.

"I would… would have understood. It's not like I never thought about it you know." No, he didn't get to be sensitive, he didn't get to be like that now. No way.

"No you wouldn't have. You never saw anything that wasn't some stupid invention. Not one time, not in Paris. Not on my birthday when all I wanted was to be alone with you. Not on that love cruise for Baljeet. You didn't even catch the mistletoe hint at Christmas!" she huffed, with each memory, he seemed to sink farther down. His eyes looked down at the book. She knew he was seeing, pictures of her looking longingly at him while he paid no mind. Pictures of her before or after she went to get whatever he needed for whatever he was doing. Maybe he was remembering all the things she did so he would be happy. Nothing about how she felt towards him. "You wouldn't have Phineas, I'm just… I don't know, we are too different now, and you were too distracted then."

Phineas got up, clearly he had gotten the message this time. He went to leave, stopped. She braced herself for whatever he was going to say. What ever excuse he had, or that he would have cared again. But no, all he did was place the book down on the chair, mutter he was sorry, and then walked out.

"What an idiot!" It had been about two weeks since that day at the hospital. Gretchen had come to visit her when she got home. The once quiet girl was now a fiery redhead with a temper, and mentality to match. "So then what happened, Izzy?"

"He left the book, and walked out." Isabella said, she had told Gretchen that she had burned the book when she returned, but she hadn't she had put it up in the closet again, after looking through it one more time. Only to remind herself that she wasn't that weak little girl any longer.

"You know… I heard that Phineas dropped out of the fancy school of his, and is gonna return to our school next year." Gretchen laughed, "Can you believe that?" When had Gretchen become so cold? When had she started seeing it as odd for the girl? She couldn't blame her, Gretchen had gotten it worse than her. She was always geeky and no boy wanted to talk to her. Now, boys would drool over them, as they ignored them

"Wonder what happened…" Isabella thought out loud

"Maybe what you said threw him off his game, Izzy. It's not every day a genius is proven to be a complete idiot, you know." She shouldn't care why did she? Oh because now if he wasn't in that stupid school, he'd be back at her school. She'd have to see him when school started. Maybe this year her mom would let her do it online, like she begged last year.

When Gretchen had left, she sat in the alcove in front of her window. Looking out, she expected to see some big, something behind Phineas' house as per normal, or was once. Those days were gone Candace saw her and waved her down. She pretended she didn't see, but Candace didn't give up, seems all that focus she once had to bust her brothers, didn't die out she just now focused it on other things. To bad she couldn't focus it on her boyfriend, Isabella didn't doubt he would mind.

She wore a long black t-shirt, and slippers down stairs and opened the door, Candace coming over to her house now. "What did you say to Phineas?"

"The truth." Isabella said plainly.

"I don't know what it was, but he was pretty upset about it."

"Tell him to join the club, we have decoder rings." She said sarcastically.

"Look alright, I know he was too stupid to see that you cared for him Isabella." Candace rubbed the back of her own neck, "But he tried to make it up to you at the hospital, he tried to bridge the gap he had made. Isn't that what you wanted, him to come to you?"

"Yeah Candace, I did. But that was a long time ago. What am I supposed to do? Run to him open my arms and say I forgive him?"

"Uh, yeah… I mean you loved him, and now he's starting to see that. And starting to realize he cared about you too." Candace crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yeah… okay… not happening." Isabella put her hands on her hips, then looked over Candace's shoulder, and saw Phineas. She hadn't noticed him from her window, he was just sitting on a chair on the porch. Not doing anything, just looking at the ground.

"Yeah he's been like that since he left you at the hospital," Candace looked back at her brother sitting in a chair, and sighed to herself. "Who would have thought, I'd want him to do something. I'm not telling you to just change back to who you were. I'm not saying just forgive him. But say something to him, we are all worried about him."

Worried about him, what about me? I was the one that had my hopes crushed time after time. Risked life and limb for some of the stunts he pulled, like when she collected that sap for that stupid bubble and that was just one of the times. All kinds of seemingly impossible things, which usually required her help. Well now he could figure it out on his own, he was so smart right? He didn't need her to do those things, he just didn't want to do it himself, and she told herself.

"Candace, I can't help," she raised her arms in surrender, and sighed looking up to the sky, "There's nothing left in me."

She closed the door, and walked numbly up the stairs. She vaguely remember closing her door and sitting on her bed. Nothing left, she thought. It was the first time she had said that to anyone. Yeah she knew there was no hope, no happiness, and nothing left for her. But saying the words, admitting to it to another human… seemed to make the last pieces of what she called her heart break. There was nothing she could do for Phineas, he was a drug that she had been addicted to, and she kicked the habit, so why would she run back to him?

Why did she even care? There was nothing left to care for, nothing left to care with. She changed her clothing, barely aware of what she was doing, she had to get out of there, she had to go… she couldn't be here, it was too quiet, too motionless. She walked out of her room, down the stairs.

"Mija? Mija!" she ignored her mother's calls as she walked out the door, she didn't care what her mother wanted, she couldn't care. She needed to get out. She didn't like where her mind was wandering, but it would end up at that boy across the street, and she didn't want to face that. Not again not again, not now. The mere thought of him caused her to glace over to where he was sitting moments ago, minutes, hours? How long had it been? Time seemed to be moving differently as her mind raced. He wasn't there. Good maybe he finally decided that she wasn't worth moping over, maybe he went back in to plan his future, or plan to do something stupid and dangerous.

Her mind flashed back, at the thought of danger. She was back in her eleven year old body, she had the hiccups, Phineas had built a haunted house to help scare the hiccups away. Nothing there really worked out they way the boy had planned, but she was alone with him… for the most part. Then the entire thing lifted into the sky and he was hanging on… she had been scared…

"Get a grip," she said aloud her herself. And continued on to where ever she was going. Bad thing about living in this area. There wasn't a place she could go without being reminded of him. Not a single… there was one place. One Phineas had never been to. She changed direction and started towards town.

She stood before an old building, three years didn't do good for the building. The letters above the door were faded, hadn't been taken care of in a while. 'Troop 46231'. She had left her key to the place inside long ago… she tried the handle, it was locked. Of course it was locked. She turned away until she heard movement inside, she turned back around and knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" a familiar voice, Milly? Milly had taken over the troop when she left, so it made sine that she would be here for the current girls of troop 4623.

"Isa… Isabella" she muttered, she knew she could be heard. The door opened, and the mousy haired girl looked up to Isabella. It had been three years since she had been here, and three years since she really paid attention to the other girl, who didn't seem to have grown much since. Oh she was filling out like someone her age, but didn't seem to have gotten much taller. She stood there, obviously wanting to know what Isabella wanted, she didn't look aggravated or annoyed. Just curious, considering how she left and what she said…

Again she seemed to be reliving her past as she remembered walking through the door she stood before even now.

"I'm done with all this!" she had yelled, while all the other girls looked shocked.

"What's the matter Isabella?" Addison had asked.

"I'm sick of all this crap, what the point of these stupid patches if I can't have the only thing I want?" she ripped off her sash, the item she cherished above almost everything else, years of work and dedication, to her troop, people who were more than friends, her family… her sisters. She felt her eyes stinging, felt the hot tears running down her cheeks, as she was snapped back to reality.

"I didn't… didn't know where else to go." Seemed even here, she couldn't escape memories, not the same ones, not the same betrayal. No this wasn't Phineas' fault, she had caused these memories here. "I should go."

"No, no come in. No one else is here right now, but…" Isabella had turned and started walking away, she didn't want to ignore the girl, but she couldn't handle these memories. She couldn't take it.

She ended up at the park, not remembering how she got there. She had been too lost in thought. It wasn't like she could get lost here, in this town. She had been all over this town. She sighed and sat on the bench, black was a good color, but it wasn't very good for the summer time. S'winter would be good about now, she thought before shutting her mind up again. That's how it had been most of the day, mentally snapping at herself for remembering something to do with him. She got up and dredged on through the hot summer day.

People moved all around her, going about their daily lives. Didn't seem fair, they all seemed to be having what they wanted. All you have to do is apologize and forgive him and you'd have what you wanted too, she told herself. But why did she have to apologize, she didn't do anything wrong, except love the wrong person it seemed. She didn't want to live like this anymore. She gave up and decided to go home there was nowhere left for her to go.

It was almost completely dark when she arrived home, and even though the sun was down, it was still too warm outside. She went into the bathroom, and literally pealed off her clothing completely and waited for the water to get at least warm enough to get under. Normally she would stand under the stream of water and feel like it was washing away everything bad, but not today, she felt clean outside. Inside however, she felt dirty. She wasn't sure if that would ever change. But more than dirty, she felt hollow. Once she was cleaned, she put on her robe and went to her room, closing and locking the door. Her phone beeped, seems she had left it there. Strange she hadn't even noticed its absence, normally she was glued to it talking to Gretchen, in some form or the other.

Couple missed calls from Gretchen, she'd get to that in a moment. Couple missed calls from the Fletcher house, those she wouldn't get to soon at all. Some from Candace, she might take the time to call back in a day or two, maybe. First though she looked through her texts, the usual from Gretchen when she didn't answer, message after message of asking where she was, or what she was doing etc. Candace hardly ever sent her a text message but there were four from her. 'Is Phineas with you?' then 'Are you there? Have you seen Phineas?' then 'Isabella, your mom said you left, where are you?' then 'We can't find him anywhere, is he with you?'

It wasn't her problem right? Maybe he just went for a walk. She had and left her phone. Other texts from others she hadn't talked to at the party, everyone looking for Phineas. Him they look for, me no I wander off all day and no one asks if I'm alright. Amidst the text messages was one she didn't know, it was a number she didn't have in her phone. 'I'm sorry Izzy, I finished looking at your book. I wanted to apologize in person again, but your mother said you went out. So I'm going to be at the place it all began, I'll know how you feel if you don't show up. I'll be here til 8.'

She looked to the clock it was 7:30 now… she got dressed and went out her room again. She shook her head, she was clean, and she was cooled off. Her mind had stopped racking itself, and now she had to go and find that little idiot, because he was playing games.

Most people thought the place it all began would be the first thing they did that summer long ago, the roller coaster… but she doubted that he'd be in his back yard if people where looking for him. The only place she could think of was the playground at school. The first day she met him when she had moved here, she didn't know if sh could make it to the school in thirty minutes. She looked at her phone, Candace was calling,

"Yeah?" she answered the phone impatiently.

"I've been trying to call you for the past few hours…"

"I left my phone at home, and Phineas isn't with me. Why would he be?" Isabella knew why he'd be with her, but she wasn't saying it.

"Because he left looking for you, he left your book here with a note that said if he didn't come back, to give it back to you."

"Didn't come back? What the hell does that mean…" but she knew what it meant. That honest boy had never meant to hurt her, and when he found out about it. He couldn't handle it, he tried everything he knew how to do to apologize. But she smacked him down each time. She started running. Ten minutes… she wasn't going to make it… what if she didn't make it? Would he wait a few more minutes to be sure? Or would he jus take it as a final rejection?

Her could hear Candace on the phone talking, but she couldn't make out the words she didn't have time to hold the phone to hear ear, to talk she needed to run. Right now she didn't care how much he hurt her… he didn't really realize it. She could see the school, its dark shape looming over head, Candace was still talking, trying to get her attention, and she could probably hear her breathing, panting from running. She wasn't going to make it.

"Phineas!" Isabella yelled, maybe he'd hear her and wait. She couldn't be there at eight, but maybe he'd hear her and know she was coming. "Phineas! I'm coming I…" she tripped, fell and rolled a few times, never dropping her phone, she got back up limping, then starting to run again. "Don't go, please be here." She whispered to herself.

She rounded the corner and stared into the play ground, she didn't see anyone. But it was dark, so he could be anywhere. "Phineas?" she said softly, too close to yell. No one answered. Then picked up the phone, "Candace... Candace, come to the school I think he's here somewhere… just come."

She hung up the phone and texted the number Phineas had texted from. 'I'm here Phineas, I'm late but I'm here.' She heard a sound and a small light near the building of the school. She ran to it, Phineas was sitting against the building, his eyes closed. She feared the worse until he moved a bit. Sleeping…

The idiot was sleeping. She kicked his foot, which made him jump and hit his head against the building. "So I'm here." She said looking down at him, he looked back up his mind obviously hadn't fully woken up.

"Unh, oh… OH… I didn't think you were going to come." She had expected him to be arrogant about her showing up. He seemed depressed, like most of the life had been sucked out of him. Now that the initial worry he'd do something foolish had passed, she put her hands on her hips.

"Well you didn't give me much choice with that note did you?" she snapped at him. She watched as the realization clicked in his mind, and knew that she had talked with Candace.

"I… that wasn't what I planned Izzy…" he started.

"Isabella…" she corrected,

"Sorry… but it wasn't what I planned, I just wanted you to get the book back is all." He didn't even bother to stand up, which she was happy for. At this angle she didn't have to look into his eyes since most of his face was covered in shadows. Though she wasn't fond of not being able to see if he was looking at her, or staring anywhere…

"You didn't think someone would say something? Are you truly that much of an idiot?" she shouted at him, making his body flinch. She heard car doors closing. Good, she thought, this wouldn't be her problem much longer. "You know I remember you differently Phineas, I remember you being strong, and smart, and loyal… well mostly loyal. Now… your trying to please someone that doesn't care anymore. I'm not the Isabella you knew, not anymore. She's gone Phineas!" he started to say something, to argue the point, then she stomped her foot on the ground just as Candace and her parents came up behind her. "Phineas! Damn it, you're just too… too good for me. I told you the Isabella you knew is gone. Deal with it, go on with your life… I am."

She turned to walk away, she had heard the foot steps behind her, she knew who it was, but it wasn't until now that she looked them in their faces. She wanted to say something, wanted to talk… but there were no words for this. At least not any that she knew, how could she explain all this to his family? They would take his side regardless right? So either way she'd be wrong. She started to walk passed his family just leaving him there. She stopped just when she was right in front of Candace.

"For the record," Isabella said loud enough Phineas could hear her, she needed to do this. This wasn't to help him, that wasn't her job to help him anymore. This was to clear her conscience. "I want you to know, I forgive you for ignoring me. Just… next time someone shows interest… don't be an idiot."

"Do you want a ride home since you ran all the way here? You must be tired Isabella." Mrs. Fletcher asked looking over at her, this was the first time she had even heard her speak in a long time.

"Quite right dear, need a ride?" Mr. Fletcher asked this time.

She looked over her shoulder at Phineas who had just gotten up from sitting against the wall, "No… walking is fine, I imagine you have things to talk about." She looked then at Candace, "He can keep the book."

She planned on just walking home, had even started walking home, but she ended up changing course. She started heading towards the old troop house. She knew no one would be there right now, but she wanted to go and just sit on the steps… Milly wasn't foolish enough to leave it unlocked. Maybe they still kept the spare key in the same place… If she decided to go in that is.

She never remembered being outside this house that was used souly for the troop after dark before. It was quite intimidating in the dark, and had she not known the place so well she would have left. Her initial plan was to sit on the porch and try not to think. Somewhere quiet where the stresses of everything that happened with Phineas could just run through her. On the way, however she decided that she was going to first check if the key was where they used to keep it for emergencies. She leaned down to a bush, next to the door, and moved parts aside looking for it.

"Ah ha," she said finding a large stone, under the stone was a key laying on a piece of folded paper. She picked both up, she had expected the key, or hoped for it anyways. But the Paper was something she didn't count on. She unfolded it, it was a note.

Isabella,

I figured you might come back when you were ready. I know what it's like to need somewhere to go and be alone. So I left the key where we used to put it. I really hope you come back.

Milly

That was nice, something she didn't expect from any of her friends from the Fireside Girls, most of them just looked at her as if she was some freak. Milly had always been one of the nicer ones, even if she was quiet most of the time. She took the key and went into the house. It looked the same as it always did. Something stable was nice, something that hadn't changed when so much around her had. She found it comforting, as she walked into the 'living room' or 'common area' and sat on one of the sofas. Soft and comfortable, as always.

She wondered if Milly was around, it was late for the Fireside Girls to be out, but Milly was a bit older now, like herself, and would more than likely be allowed out of her home later. She wasn't sure she would have wanted to talk to the girl, it wasn't that she didn't like her. Just no one really saw her as much of a person anymore. And she tended to act like a freak, when people would look at her as such. Her phone started to buzz, she looked at it, her mother. She ignored the call, it wasn't that late. She had stayed out much later than this before. She closed her eyes a moment and took a deep breath.

When her eyes opened, it was light outside, and she heard talking coming from where the kitchen. Had she fallen asleep? That's a stupid question, she thought to herself. It's light outside so yeah. She got up and stretched, maybe she could sneak out before someone realized she was awake. She grabbed her phone, and started towards the door, when she heard footsteps behind her.

"And where are you going?" it wasn't Milly's voice, took her a moment to remember it. She turned around looking at one of her old friend. Blonde hair, green eyes, and just a little shorter than she was, Katie.

"Um…" was all her mind could come up with. What use was a mind when it didn't work right when you needed it to?

"Yeah, no… Milly is cooking something and she'll be upset if you leave." Katie said, then looked behind her, "Look we get what happened, and we are sorry for how we acted."

"Yeah? Well that makes it all better then. Look sorry to barge in here last night, I only planned to rest a minute and gather my thoughts." Isabella tried to keep her voice straight and neutral, "But I'm sure people are freaking out since I didn't come home."

"No, when your Mom phoned us to see if we knew where you were, Milly said you were with her, so yeah." Ginger said walking out of the kitchen.

"Since you seem so intend on apologizing, why don't you apologize to Gretchen, you treated her as badly as you did me." Isabella kept her mask of indifference, and narrowed her eyes at Ginger.

"We did, in fact she already accepted our apology," Milly said coming out of the kitchen, carrying plates of food, followed by yet another of her older friends Holly.

"How many of you are in there?" Isabella her eyes narrowed, not sure she wanted to have to have a reunion that she didn't want to be at.

"Well, everyone from the old troop. This was planned a while back for everyone to get together." Milly said, Isabella remember receiving a letter from them, she never bothered opening it. If she had, she wouldn't have ended up here.

"Well I didn't mean to crash a party for you guy's troop." Isabella started towards the door, and someone grabbed her shoulder.

"It was your troop Isabella, you formed it." Addison had made her appearance while she was leaving she supposed, and in all rights she should have taken over the troop and not Milly.

"I left it behind, like I left everything else behind. None of you were keeping up, and I had to keep going or be destroyed. Simple as that." Isabella brushed the hand off her, and reached for the door knob.

"Izzy," so it was true, even Gretchen was there. When Milly had said, 'everyone' she thought that implied Gretchen too, but she thought Gretchen would have told her if she had planned to attend this thing. "Izzy, they are sorry, you know? And they want to make things right again."

So her only friend she had left, no longer understood. Isabella had thought Gretchen understood it wasn't the Fireside Girls that caused her to feel like she had. Maybe Gretchen had just thought Phineas was an excuse for her real feelings. Stupid girl, "They can't make it right for me Gretchen. None of you can, so enjoy your breakfast."

(Not complete will be soon, thank you al for being so good with waiting.)


	2. Completely revised edition

(Isabella PoV)

She stood there in her simple black underwear, looking at the cloths lying on the bed. None of them were what the boy had been used to. Once he started going to that new private school, and left everyone behind. Though she knew it wasn't personal, he wasn't too bright when it came to matters of people, ideas and inventions that was where he exceled. She let her eyes scan across the clothing that she had again. Black or dark, that's what became of the bright sunny girl from across the street. She wouldn't even be here trying to decide, if her mother hadn't told her that she had to go over there for some party or something. Stupid.

Once she realized that he wouldn't ever see her as anything other than the girl across the street, she turned into her self. At first, she just stopped going over there. Then her friends, or the ones that used to be her friends kept poking and prodding her trying to figure out why she never went over to help Phineas. Well most of her friends had gone. There was Gretchen, her and Gretchen still had the same views, no one cared. Ever cared beyond what they wanted.

Isabella stood looking out her window, across the street to the place where she had gone so many times, but not anymore. There he was, Phineas, the boy to whom her heart used to flutter from the sheer sight of him. Now the sight of him only left it aching, breaking. She tried so many times to get him to just notice her, to notice how she felt. It wasn't that she was shy, she made it obvious how she felt. Everyone knew it, everyone except the one that she wanted to know. How long had it been since she even bothered to go over there?

Three years…? She was fourteen now, so yeah three years. Had it really been that long? Yeah it had been three years since she had even bothered going across the street to her neighbor's house, where the most marvelous things had been constructed. Wonder and amazement, but never what she wanted, never what she was looking for. Phineas… how long had it been since she even thought about his name? Since the last time she saw him, a couple months ago. Ever since he started going to that private school, she had hardly seen him or his brother Ferb. Her friends? Longer. She decided to leave the Fireside Girls long ago, all but of course Gretchen. She had decided, what was the point in collecting stupid patches, when what she really wanted was so far out of reach?

She decided that she didn't need to impress him anymore, she didn't need the frustrations. Her life had become less complicated when she stopped fawning over him, didn't it? Didn't it, she asked herself and got no reply. Yes it did, she decided to answer, though she really didn't believe it. At least it would only be one day, one party she had to attend. She pulled a black skirt up her legs and over the slender hips that had developed since she had last seen him, pulled a black shirt over her head, with white print on the front, which simply said, "Who cares?" a stab at the boy who she had loved and had ignored her. The party was for him anyways wasn't it, so why should she care? He never had.

She finished it off with the makeup she normally wore whenever she went out, nothing special. She started with the eyeliner, and then finished with the black lipstick. She wished she could wear more, but it didn't complement her skin tone too well. She grabbed a box out of her closet, to put the gift her mother had bought so she'd have something to give him. When told about the party, she said she didn't want to buy anything for him. That she didn't know what he'd want. Then stated, that he wouldn't even notice if she brought one, wouldn't even notice if she was there at all. Another failed attempt at getting out of going. Her only reason for forcing herself to go, was that Gretchen would be there too, against her will. And at least she'd have someone to talk to. She looked in the mirror that used to be outlined in pictures of her and her friends, and Phineas. Black clothing, no bow. She liked how she looked, thought it was an improvement over the weak person she once was. Let's get this over with, she said to herself.

"See you over there, Mija" her mother called after her as she walked out, she didn't reply just continued walking. She saw others arriving, some of her old Fireside friends, who looked at her. Mouths agape, they went to different schools so they hadn't seen her in a long time, and had long since stopped coming over.

"I don't care what you think." The words came out her mouth just as easy as breathing as she passed them, and their shocked faces. She continued on, leaving the girls to stare after her.

Just through the gate, she said to herself, you can do this Isabella don't let them see you hesitate. She walked into the backyard looking around. There was Buford, at least he looked cleaner than he used to. Baljeet standing next to Buford, as was always. She hadn't expected that friendship to last, maybe there was more than she saw, not that she really cared much. Ginger was standing next to Baljeet, maybe they had become a couple in her absence. Her former friends from the front had come in, Milly, Addison, and Holly. Candace was talking to Katie, another of her former Fireside Girl friends. Ferb, was just standing around not really doing much. No Gretchen… great now what. She placed the box on the table next to the rest and made her way to the tree that stood in the back yard, leaning against it.

Phineas wasn't out here yet either, maybe she could just say something to him, give him her gift, and leave. Technically that was going to the party, right?

"Who is that?" she heard Candace ask Katie and the other Fireside Girls, she knew they were looking at her. She turned her head and glanced at them from the corner of her eyes, yeah Candace was looking right at her.

"That's Isabella," Milly, the mousy haired girl, replied in a shushed tone.

"Yeah, I haven't seen her since she left the Fireside Girls." One of them said, they all nodded in agreement.

"None of you have talked to her in years?" Candace folded her arms over he chest looking at the girls. When they all just stared back, Candace started coming towards her. Isabella pushed herself off the tree, and started towards the gate that would lead her back home, "Isabella!" Candace called.

She stopped, counted to ten. Why was she so angry? Candace never did anything to her, she was hyper, and always trying to bust the boys, but she listened when she had calmed down enough anyways. She turned to Candace, "Hey Candace."

"Haven't seen you in a while," Isabella only shrugged, and then looked back to her former friends. Ginger and her sister Stacy had shown up. Stacy like Candace had filled out. Isabella didn't have that issue, she started to curve at about twelve or so, she didn't remember. She didn't care.

"It happens, look I left the gift for Phineas on the table, for whatever this is," raising her arms indicating everything around them, "I'm gonna go." Isabella said flatly, and then was stopped by Ginger.

"Hey Isabella." She said, Isabella just stared at her a moment, when it seemed that Ginger wouldn't move.

"Hey Ginger, long time… I gotta go." Isabella said with equal flatness as before. No emotion, no hint about how each moment she stayed in this yard was another moment closer to Phineas arriving.

"You're not going to tell Phineas Happy Birthday?" Stacy had said somewhere over her shoulder. It was Phineas' birthday, at one point she would have remembered, would have counted down the days. But she didn't anymore… obviously the look on her face said everything.

"You forgot? You?" Ginger looked shocked, Isabella scoffed and put as much bite in her voice as she could muster.

"I'm not his keeper. Now if you'll…" she started, but a voice interrupted her. No… not that voice. Not him, not now, she was so close to the gate.

"Isabella?" it was Phineas, so he did notice she was here. Big surprise. She turned to look at him, he was walking up, and she watched him come closer from between Stacy and Candace. "I haven't seen you in…"

"I left your gift on the table, I-I have to go." Isabella turned, feelings that she hadn't felt in years was surging through her, and something was building to an explosion. Feelings she couldn't… wouldn't allow to start again. She wouldn't let those feeling tear her apart anymore. She walked past them, past the others coming in that she didn't remember. Phineas was calling for her, she noticed that no one else was talking anymore, everyone now watched her. She stopped, turned and looked back at Phineas. She wasn't sure what her face looked like, but Stacy and Candace took a step back. "No." her voice wasn't flat, it had bite in it. "I-I… For years…" she couldn't get her mind to form the words she wanted to yell at him.

Phineas just stared at her waiting, along with everyone else, though all she could see were Candace, Stacy, Ginger and of course Phineas. How long had they waited for this show down? "You ignored how I felt… you were too blind to see it and now I'm supposed to care? No, it doesn't work that way." That something that was building inside got bigger. She didn't yell, she didn't need to, her voice was low, but was sure everyone heard. When did her heart start beating faster? When did the tears start, messing up her makeup? When did she allow these feelings of hurt and rejection back? Then she whispered, "I hadn't felt… damn you Phineas." From the looks on the faces around her, she was sure only the four closest to her heard it. Then she smiled, she knew it looked fake, "Happy Birthday."

She turned and walked out the gate, across the lawn. No talking behind her, no laughing like she expected. No damning words, nothing. She expected something, someone to tell her she couldn't say what she said, or to run out to her. But nothing, maybe she was right, they all wanted to just ignore her, and she just made it easier. She made it to the sidewalk, when it all hit her again. Those feelings building up, looking for an escape, she slipped and fell to her knees which luckily hit the grass before the sidewalk. She needed to go, she couldn't… too late. It erupted, surging from her stomach, to her heart, to her throat, she screamed. The sound was full of anger and frustration drowned in sadness.

She had to go, she couldn't wait here they couldn't see her like this. She couldn't allow it, not after all this time. Damn her mother for making her go, damn Phineas for making her feel like this. Damn herself for letting her break down. Voices surrounded her, hands grabbing at her which she shook off, and failed to get back to her feet, leaving her to just lean against the ground. All those voiced reverberated off her at once.

"Isabella?" "Are you alright?" "What happened?" "What's wrong?" "Is she hurt?"

"Leave. Me. Alone. " Her voice was flat, she wanted them all to leave her alone. She just wanted to go home and forget all about these feelings, lock them back in their box.

"No. I won't." she swung her head towards the voice that told her 'no'. It was Phineas kneeling beside her, it was his hands that was grabbing her.

"I-I have to…" tears burned her eyes as she stared at him. She had always wanted him to look at her like that, with compassion, and care. But it just broke her more. Too late, she said in her mind, that girl is gone now. Dead. She pushed him off her. She was letting these feelings get the better of her. Not this time, she refused. She managed to get to her feet, and stumbled due to blurry vision, and fell again. Everything went black.

More voices around her, concerned voices, and reassuring voices. At first she thought she was in a room, until it moved, she moved. Then someone was yelling to be careful. She opened her eyes, everything was blurry, her head hurt. She moved her hand up to her head, something warm smeared across her hand. She pulled it back looking at it, red. Her vision was blurry, but she didn't have any problem figuring out she fell head first on the sidewalk. But who was with her? She turned her head, it was Mrs. Fletcher in the passenger seat, Okay not so bad, Candace was driving… alright. By her feet was her mother. She looked up, but she couldn't keep her eyes open long enough to see who was above her.

When she awoke again, there were more voices, explaining that the stitches would have to come out in about a week. More hushed talking, she heard footsteps, and then heard her mother asking someone in the room to wait with her, she assumed she was 'her', while she went out to talk with the doctor.

"You're awake." A voice said, she knew the voice, and she kept her eyes closed. The voice belonged to the one person she didn't want to talk to at the moment… moment… she didn't want to talk to him, period. She pretended that she was still sleeping. "I noticed your breathing changed, Isabella you're awake."

She should have known he would be too smart to fall for that. He was smart about people in that way, but feelings… he was an idiot. "What?"

"Are you alright?" How could he dare ask that… oh her head, yeah that made sense. She didn't think that he would pick now to become apparent to her feelings, or former feelings. Then again she did just tell him…

"My head is fine." Straight and to the point, she kept her eyes closed, she didn't want to see him. She wondered if her makeup was still running on her face or if someone had cleaned it.

"That's not what I meant Isabella, and you know it." His voice was stern yet filled with concern. Wonderful time to see how others are feeling, when they have to tell you straight out. What an idiot.

"I'll be fine when… when…" when would she be fine? When she was able to lock all that crap away? When she was able to get away from him? When the world opened up and swallowed her? Obviously the last one wasn't ready, her head just bounced off it right now. "I'll be fine."

"I didn't… I didn't know." He said, he sounded truthful… of course he was being truthful he never had lied before, why should he now?

"You are an idiot." She kept her voice low, hoping her mother wouldn't hear her, she didn't want to be yelled at on top of everything. She had made a pretty big scene, maybe now she'll realize she shouldn't have pushed her to go when she obviously had reasons for not wanting to go.

"Yeah I guess so." He said, she heard rustling paper being ripped open. She opened her eyes a little to see that he was opening the gift that she brought. Obviously he noticed she was looking, or at least was paying attention, "Candace brought your gift here after going back to get a change of cloths for you."

Cloths for… she realized she was wearing what all patients wore a gown, and nothing else. How long had she been asleep? She knew head injuries required x-rays, she had gotten stitches obviously, couple hours she guessed. "Aren't you supposed to see if I have memory loss?"

"Well do you?" he had stopped opening his gift, looking at her. Idiot, he is a complete idiot. "Oh well never mind that was a stupid… never mind."

"Idiot." she huffed, and found that as long as she didn't look at him, she could talk to him without her heart racing. Without those feelings rearing its ugly head.

"So... uhm nice new look." He seemed to be trying to make small talk, she'd fix that awkwardness.

"You know you don't have to talk to me. I did ruin your party." Why did she even care if she ruined his party, he ruined her emotions. Stupid idiot.

"So? You know… maybe you don't. But I hadn't had a birthday party since you stopped coming over. Only reason why I agreed to this year was because mom said you were going to come." The rustling again, he obviously wanted to know what her mother got him. Should she mention that she didn't buy the gift… maybe if he didn't like it she would tell him who bought it. Her eyes opened, and she stared at the box. Her eyes widened, that wasn't the box with the gift her mother bought, that was the box that she had put something she made for Phineas' birthday a long time ago.

"No wait. That's the wrong…" but he had already opened it. She lunged off the bed, and landed on him, the chair he was in obviously not designed for this, toppled back and they both ended up on the floor. "No give that here, that's not…" too late, she told herself as he held the book in his hands. Why did she keep that? Because until now she didn't even remember she had it. She righted herself and got back onto the bed, sitting now though.

"It says 'Happy Birthday Phineas' on it. But it's not mine?" he looked confused, and she looked mortified. And she shook her head.

"No that's from, before. It's mine, so… give it back." She held out her hand, he just opened it and turned the pages. He used to listen to me, now he was like everyone else. No one paid much attention to her. She watched as he flipped through the book, of bad drawings, and pictures she had written around. A confession of her love in a book she planned on giving him. Then she gave up and packed the book away along with all her emotions. She wanted to leave, she wanted him to go.

"Why didn't you give this to me before Isabella?" she looked at him, just stared at him. How was she supposed to have given it to him, when its meaning would have been wasted on an idiot? "Maybe…"

"Maybe? No, if I had given it to you then, you'd have been as clueless as always." She folded her arms over her chest, ick the robe was pink. Her once favorite color had easily become her most hated.

"I would… would have understood. It's not like I never thought about it you know." No, he didn't get to be sensitive, he didn't get to be like that now. No way.

"No you wouldn't have. You never saw anything that wasn't some stupid invention. Not one time, not in Paris. Not on my birthday when all I wanted was to be alone with you. Not on that love cruise for Baljeet. You didn't even catch the mistletoe hint at Christmas!" she huffed, with each memory, he seemed to sink farther down. His eyes looked down at the book. She knew he was seeing, pictures of her looking longingly at him while he paid no mind. Pictures of her before or after she went to get whatever he needed for whatever he was doing. Maybe he was remembering all the things she did so he would be happy. Nothing about how she felt towards him. "You wouldn't have Phineas, I'm just… I don't know, we are too different now, and you were too distracted then."

Phineas got up, clearly he had gotten the message this time. He went to leave, stopped. She braced herself for whatever he was going to say. What ever excuse he had, or that he would have cared again. But no, all he did was place the book down on the chair, mutter he was sorry, and then walked out.

"What an idiot!" It had been three days since that day at the hospital. Gretchen had come to visit her when she got home. The once quiet girl was now a fiery redhead with a temper, and mentality to match. "So then what happened, Izzy?"

"He left the book, and walked out." Isabella said, she had told Gretchen that she had burned the book when she returned, but she hadn't she had put it up in the closet again, after looking through it one more time. Only to remind herself that she wasn't that weak little girl any longer.

"You know… I heard that Phineas dropped out of the fancy school of his, and is gonna return to our school next year." Gretchen laughed, "Can you believe that?" When had Gretchen become so cold? When had she started seeing it as odd for the girl to be cold? She couldn't blame her, Gretchen had gotten it worse than her. She was always geeky and no boy wanted to talk to her even worse their own friends hardly talked with her, at least they respected her for the most part. Now, boys would drool over them, others wanted to be their friends and they ignored them all. People assumed they were just snobby in a gothic sort of way. But that wasn't the case, they just didn't trust anyone.

"Wonder what happened…" Isabella thought out loud.

"Maybe what you said threw him off his game, Izzy. It's not every day a genius is proven to be a complete idiot, you know." She shouldn't care, why did she? Oh because now if he wasn't in that stupid school, he'd be back at her school. She'd have to see him when school started. Maybe this year her mom would let her do it online, like she begged last year.

When Gretchen had left, she sat in the alcove in front of her window. Looking out, she expected to see some big, something behind Phineas' house as per normal, or was once. Those days were gone Candace saw her and waved her down. She pretended she didn't see, but Candace didn't give up, seems all that focus she once had to bust her brothers, didn't die out she just now focused it on other things. To bad she couldn't focus it on her boyfriend, Isabella didn't doubt he would mind.

She wore a long black t-shirt, and slippers down stairs and opened the door, Candace coming over to her house now. "What did you say to Phineas?"

"The truth." Isabella said plainly.

"I don't know what it was, but he was pretty upset about it."

"Tell him to join the club, we have decoder rings." She said sarcastically.

"Look alright, I know he was too stupid to see that you cared for him Isabella." Candace rubbed the back of her own neck, "But he tried to make it up to you at the hospital, he tried to bridge the gap he had made. Isn't that what you wanted, him to come to you?"

"Yeah Candace, I did. But that was a long time ago. What am I supposed to do? Run to him open my arms and say I forgive him?"

"Uh, yeah… I mean you loved him, and now he's starting to see that. And starting to realize he cared about you too." Candace crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yeah… okay… not happening." Isabella put her hands on her hips, then looked over Candace's shoulder, and saw Phineas. She hadn't noticed him from her window, he was just sitting on a chair on the porch. Not doing anything, just looking at the ground.

"Yeah he's been like that since he left you at the hospital," Candace looked back at her brother sitting in a chair, and sighed to herself. "Who would have thought, I'd want him to do something. I'm not telling you to just change back to who you were. I'm not saying just forgive him. But say something to him, we are all worried about him."

Worried about him, what about me? I was the one that had my hopes crushed time after time. Risked life and limb for some of the stunts he pulled, like when she collected that sap for that stupid bubble and that was just one of the times. All kinds of seemingly impossible things, which usually required her help. Well now he could figure it out on his own, he was so smart right? He didn't need her to do those things, he just didn't want to do it himself, and she told herself.

"Candace, I can't help," she raised her arms in surrender, and sighed looking up to the sky, "There's nothing left in me."

She closed the door, and walked numbly up the stairs. She vaguely remembered closing her door and sitting on her bed. Nothing left, she thought. It was the first time she had said that to anyone. Yeah she knew there was no hope, no happiness, and nothing left for her. But saying the words, admitting to it to another human… seemed to make the last pieces of what she called her heart break. There was nothing she could do for Phineas, he was a drug that she had been addicted to, and she kicked the habit, so why would she run back to him?

Why did she even care? There was nothing left to care for, nothing left to care with. She changed her clothing, barely aware of what she was doing, she had to get out of there, she had to go… she couldn't be here, it was too quiet, too motionless. She walked out of her room, down the stairs.

"Mija? Mija!" she ignored her mother's calls as she walked out the door, she didn't care what her mother wanted, she couldn't care. She needed to get out. She didn't like where her mind was wandering, but it would end up at that boy across the street, and she didn't want to face that. Not again, not now

Her mind flashed back, at the thought of danger. She was back in her eleven year old body, she had the hiccups, Phineas had built a haunted house to help scare the hiccups away. Nothing there really worked out the way the boy had planned, but she was alone with him… for the most part. Then the entire thing lifted into the sky and he was hanging on… she had been scared…

"Get a grip," she said aloud her herself. And continued on to where ever she was going. Only bad thing about living in this area, there wasn't a place she could go without being reminded of him. Not a single… there was one place. One Phineas had never been to. She changed direction and started towards town.

She stood before an old building, three years didn't do building good. The letters above the door were faded, hadn't been taken care of in a while. 'Troop 46231'. She had left her key to the place inside long ago… she tried the handle, it was locked. Of course it was locked. She turned away until she heard movement inside, she turned back around and knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" a familiar voice, Milly? Milly had taken over the troop when she left, so it made sine that she would be here for the current girls of troop 46231.

"Isa… Isabella" she muttered, she knew she could be heard. The door opened, and the mousy haired girl looked up to Isabella. It had been three years since she had been here, and three years since she really paid attention to the other girl, who didn't seem to have grown much since. Oh she was filling out like someone her age, but didn't seem to have gotten much taller. She stood there, obviously wanting to know what Isabella wanted, she didn't look aggravated or annoyed. Just curious, considering how she left and what she said…

Again she seemed to be reliving her past as she remembered walking through the door she stood before even now.

"I'm done with all this!" she had yelled, while all the other girls looked shocked.

"What's the matter Isabella?" Addison had asked.

"I'm sick of all this crap, what the point of these stupid patches if I can't have the only thing I want?" she ripped off her sash, the item she cherished above almost everything else, years of work and dedication, to her troop, people who were more than friends, her family… her sisters. She felt her eyes stinging, felt the hot tears running down her cheeks, as she was snapped back to reality.

"I didn't… didn't know where else to go." Seemed even here, she couldn't escape memories, not the same ones, not the same betrayal. No this wasn't Phineas' fault, she had caused these memories here. "I should go."

"No, no come in. No one else is here right now, but…" Isabella had turned and started walking away, she didn't want to ignore the girl, but she couldn't handle these memories. She couldn't take it.

She ended up at the park, not remembering how she got there. She had been too lost in thought. It wasn't like she could get lost here, in this town. She had been all over this town. She sighed and sat on the bench, black was a good color, but it wasn't very good for the summer time. S'winter would be good about now, she thought before shutting her mind up again. That's how it had been most of the day, mentally snapping at herself for remembering something to do with him. She got up and dredged on through the hot summer day.

People moved all around her, going about their daily lives. Didn't seem fair, they all seemed to be having what they wanted. All you have to do is apologize and forgive him and you'd have what you wanted too, she told herself. But why did she have to apologize, she didn't do anything wrong, except love the wrong person it seemed. She didn't want to live like this anymore. She gave up and decided to go home there was nowhere left for her to go.

It was almost completely dark when she arrived home, and even though the sun was down, it was still too warm outside. She went into the bathroom, and literally pealed off her clothing completely and waited for the water to get at least warm enough to get under. Normally she would stand under the stream of water and feel like it was washing away everything bad, but not today, she felt clean outside. Inside however, she felt dirty. She wasn't sure if that would ever change. But more than dirty, she felt hollow. Once she was cleaned, she put on her robe and went to her room, closing and locking the door. Her phone beeped, seems she had left it there. Strange she hadn't even noticed its absence, normally she was glued to it talking to Gretchen, in some form or the other.

She sat on her bed letting her hair dry naturally she learned long time ago what heat did to her hair, and that was to be avoided at all costs. That's how she got the nickname Izzy after all. Really she was kinda glad that no one called her that, except of course Gretchen, and there was no stopping that.

After talking with Candace, something taunted her… a reminder she had almost forgotten if she could just remember what it was. She shrugged, and figured she would remember it sooner or later, and get rid of it. She sat at her computer, opened the word program that had become like a second friend, and typed about her day…

The next day had been tolerable so far, her mother wasn't complaining about this or that, Phineas hadn't tried to come over… he hadn't since the hospital, but each day she was thankful for it. Candace didn't try to get her to make up with Phineas… the only really bad part was Gretchen had some family thing to do and couldn't come over. But those things happened right?

She turned on the television, and lounged on her bed watching the tail end of some zombie horror movie. She yawned it was one that she had seen before, but she didn't have anything else to do.

"Hey there are some dvds in the closet," she said aloud and started rummaging through her closet. Tossing this and that out as she went, she thought she should take the time to clean this thing out, as she pulled out one of her older pink jumpers. "I can't believe I wore this." She tossed it out of the closet, in a different pile she mentally labeled trash.

Among the 'trash' she managed to find 2 more jumpers, a couple white t-shirts, that she had first thought she might be able to wear… results having to cut one of them off when she managed to get it on. Couple old bows, and some Fireside Girl berets, maybe she'd drop them off with Milly, she didn't want them but it didn't mean someone couldn't use it. One of her old red sneakers… "I wondered where that went." Couple Fireside Girl uniforms on hangers in the back of the closet… "How long have I let this crap pile up…" shouldn't have used the closet as a dumpster, she told herself.

She reached up to the top of the closet to pull down some boxes, she snatched her hand back when she touched the box that held the book she had made for Phineas… that's what's taunting me, she thought as she reached up and took the book, she handled it as if it might bite her. She set it on the bed and stared at it.

She went back to work hoping the single minded focus of cleaning the closet would block thought of the book out… she was wrong. Every few minutes she had to mentally slap herself to keep her mind on the task. Box after box of memories, this was really stupid she thought. As she put item after item in the 'trash' pile she thought, she had saved some of the most useless crap… a menu from 'Chez Platypus', a pamphlet from the Spa she had helped Phineas with, A score sheet from the first time she and Phineas had played mini golf at 'Little Duffer's' Even a flyer for the stupid lemonade stand… she stuffed it all into the stupid book, put everything into a box the book on top.

"It's just a stupid book." She picked up the box, took it downstairs and out the front door intending to drop it in the trash can. Then she looked over at Phineas' house. Sighed, she put the box next to the trashcan at the curb. She grabbed the book and crept over to Phineas' house… he did seem to like the book, and I don't want the damned thing. Giving it to him would ensure that she wouldn't see it again.

She pushed it through the mail slot and took off back to her house, closing the door a bit too hard when she came back in. Then she ran back upstairs, and into the safety of her own room. She looked back at the closet, mostly cleaned, and organized enough that she could find something if she wanted too… no dvds though, too bad. She went back to watching TV and tried to get her mind to calm down, there was some slasher movie on now… better than nothing, at least she hadn't seen it before. She closed her eyes one minute, and the next it was late in the evening… no one even bothered to wake her up for diner. She picked up her phone to see what time it was.

Couple missed calls from Gretchen, she'd get to that in a moment. Couple missed calls from the Fletcher house, those she wouldn't get to soon at all, no doubt about the book. Some from Candace, she might take the time to call back in a day or two, maybe. First though she looked through her texts, the usual from Gretchen when she didn't answer, message after message of asking where she was, or what she was doing etc. Candace hardly ever sent her a text message but there were four from her. 'Is Phineas with you?' then 'Are you there? Have you seen Phineas?' then 'Isabella, your mom said you left, where are you?' then 'We can't find him anywhere, is he with you?' her mom thought she left? Well that explained why no one came to check on her at least.

It wasn't her problem right? Maybe he just went for a walk. Amidst the text messages was one she didn't know, it was a number she didn't have in her phone. 'I'm sorry Izzy, I finished looking at your book. I wanted to apologize in person again, but your mother said you went out. So I'm going to be at the place it all began, I'll know how you feel if you don't show up. I'll be here til 8.'

She looked to the clock it was 7:30 now… she got dressed and went out her room again. She shook her head, she was clean, and she was cooled off. Her mind had stopped racking itself, and now she had to go and find that little idiot, because he was playing games.

Most people thought the place it all began would be the first thing they did that summer long ago, the roller coaster… but she doubted that he'd be in his back yard if people where looking for him. The only place she could think of was the playground at school. The first day she met him when she had moved here, she didn't know if she could make it to the school in thirty minutes. She looked at her phone, Candace was calling,

"Yeah?" she answered the phone impatiently.

"I've been trying to call you for the past few hours…"

"I fell asleep watching some movie, and Phineas isn't with me. Why would he be?" Isabella knew why Candace thought he's be with her, maybe they thought that stupid book was some kind of signal or sign.

"Because he left looking for you, he left your book here with a note that said if he didn't come back, to give it back to you."

"Didn't come back? What the hell does that mean…" but she knew what it meant. That honest boy had never meant to hurt her, and when he found out about it. He couldn't handle it, he tried everything he knew how to do to apologize. But she smacked him down each time. She started running. Ten minutes… she wasn't going to make it… what if she didn't make it? Would he wait a few more minutes to be sure? Or would he just take it as a final rejection?

She could hear Candace on the phone talking, but she couldn't make out the words, she didn't have time to hold the phone to hear ear to talk, she needed to run. Right now she didn't care how much he hurt her… he didn't really realize it. She could see the school, its dark shape looming over head, Candace was still talking, trying to get her attention, and she could probably hear her breathing, panting from running. She wasn't going to make it.

"Phineas!" Isabella yelled, maybe he'd hear her and wait. She couldn't be there at eight, but maybe he'd hear her and know she was coming. "Phineas! I'm coming I…" she tripped, fell and rolled a few times, never dropping her phone, she got back up limping, then starting to run again. "Don't go, please be here." She whispered to herself.

She rounded the corner and stared into the play ground, she didn't see anyone. But it was dark, so he could be anywhere. "Phineas?" she said softly, too close to yell. No one answered. Then picked up the phone, "Candace... Candace, come to the school I think he's here somewhere… just come."

She hung up the phone and texted the number Phineas had texted from. 'I'm here Phineas, I'm late but I'm here.' She heard a sound and a small light near the building of the school. She ran to it, Phineas was sitting against the building, his eyes closed. She feared the worse until he moved a bit. Sleeping…

The idiot was sleeping. She kicked his foot, which made him jump and hit his head against the building. "So I'm here." She said looking down at him, he looked back up his mind obviously hadn't fully woken up.

"Unh, oh… OH… I didn't think you were going to come." She had expected him to be arrogant about her showing up. He seemed depressed, like most of the life had been sucked out of him. Now that the initial worry he'd do something foolish had passed, she put her hands on her hips.

"Well you didn't give me much choice with that note did you?" she snapped at him. She watched as the realization clicked in his mind, and knew that she had talked with Candace.

"I… that wasn't what I planned Izzy…" he started.

"Isabella…" she corrected,

"Sorry… but it wasn't what I planned, I just wanted you to get the book back is all." He didn't even bother to stand up, which she was happy for. At this angle she didn't have to look into his eyes since most of his face was covered in shadows. Though she wasn't fond of not being able to see if he was looking at her, or staring anywhere…

"You didn't think someone would say something? Are you truly that much of an idiot?" she shouted at him, making his body flinch. She heard car doors closing. Good, she thought, this wouldn't be her problem much longer. "You know I remember you differently Phineas, I remember you being strong, and smart, and loyal… well mostly loyal. Now… you're trying to please someone that doesn't care anymore. I'm not the Isabella you knew, not anymore. She's gone Phineas!" he started to say something, to argue the point, then she stomped her foot on the ground just as Candace and her parents came up behind her. "Phineas! Damn it, you're just too… too good for me. I told you the Isabella you knew is gone. Deal with it, go on with your life… I am."

She turned to walk away, she had heard the foot steps behind her, she knew who it was, but it wasn't until now that she looked them in their faces. She wanted to say something, wanted to talk… but there were no words for this. At least not any that she knew, how could she explain all this to his family? They would take his side regardless right? So either way she'd be wrong. She started to walk passed his family just leaving him there. She stopped just when she was right in front of Candace.

"For the record," Isabella said loud enough Phineas could hear her, she needed to do this. This wasn't to help him, that wasn't her job to help him anymore. This was to clear her conscience. "I want you to know, I forgive you for ignoring me. Just… next time someone shows interest… don't be an idiot."

"Do you want a ride home since you ran all the way here? You must be tired Isabella." Mrs. Fletcher asked looking over at her, this was the first time she had even heard her speak in a long time.

"Quite right dear, need a ride?" Mr. Fletcher asked this time.

She looked over her shoulder at Phineas who had just gotten up from sitting against the wall, "No… walking is fine, I imagine you have things to talk about." She looked then at Candace, "He can keep the book."

She planned on just walking home, had even started walking home, but she ended up changing course. She started heading towards the old troop house. She knew no one would be there right now, but she wanted to go and just sit on the steps… Milly wasn't foolish enough to leave it unlocked. Maybe they still kept the spare key in the same place… If she decided to go in that is.

She never remembered being outside this house that was used souly for the troop after dark before. It was quite intimidating in the dark, and had she not known the place so well she would have left. Her initial plan was to sit on the porch and try not to think. Somewhere quiet where the stresses of everything that happened with Phineas could just run through her. On the way, however she decided that she was going to first check if the key was where they used to keep it for emergencies. She leaned down to a bush, next to the door, and moved parts aside looking for it.

"Ah ha," she said finding a large stone, under the stone was a key laying on a piece of folded paper. She picked both up, she had expected the key, or hoped for it anyways. But the Paper was something she didn't count on. She unfolded it, it was a note.

Isabella,

I figured you might come back when you were ready. I know what it's like to need somewhere to go and be alone. So I left the key where we used to put it. I really hope you come back.

Milly

That was nice, something she didn't expect from any of her friends from the Fireside Girls, most of them just looked at her as if she was some freak. Milly had always been one of the nicer ones, even if she was quiet most of the time. She took the key and went into the house. It looked the same as it always did. Something stable was nice, something that hadn't changed when so much around her had. She found it comforting, as she walked into the 'living room' or 'common area' and sat on one of the sofas. Soft and comfortable, as always.

She wondered if Milly was around, it was late for the Fireside Girls to be out, but Milly was a bit older now, like herself, and would more than likely be allowed out of her home later. She wasn't sure she would have wanted to talk to the girl, it wasn't that she didn't like her. Just no one really saw her as much of a person anymore. And she tended to act like a freak, when people would look at her as such. Her phone started to buzz, she looked at it, her mother. She ignored the call, it wasn't that late. She had stayed out much later than this before. She closed her eyes a moment and took a deep breath.

When her eyes opened, it was light outside, and she heard talking coming from where the kitchen. Had she fallen asleep? That's a stupid question, she thought to herself. It's light outside so yeah. She got up and stretched, maybe she could sneak out before someone realized she was awake. She grabbed her phone, and started towards the door, when she heard footsteps behind her.

"And where are you going?" it wasn't Milly's voice, took her a moment to remember it. She turned around looking at one of her old friend. Blonde hair, green eyes, and just a little shorter than she was, Katie.

"Um…" was all her mind could come up with. What use was a mind when it didn't work right when you needed it to?

"Yeah, no… Milly is cooking something and she'll be upset if you leave." Katie said, then looked behind her, "Look we get what happened, and we are sorry for how we acted."

"Yeah? Well that makes it all better then. Look sorry to barge in here last night, I only planned to rest a minute and gather my thoughts." Isabella tried to keep her voice straight and neutral, "But I'm sure people are freaking out since I didn't come home."

"No, when your Mom phoned us to see if we knew where you were, Milly said you were with her, so yeah." Ginger said walking out of the kitchen.

"Since you seem so intend on apologizing, why don't you apologize to Gretchen, you treated her as badly as you did me." Isabella kept her mask of indifference, and narrowed her eyes at Ginger.

"We did, in fact she already accepted our apology," Milly said coming out of the kitchen, carrying plates of food, followed by yet another of her older friends Holly.

"How many of you are in there?" Isabella her eyes narrowed, not sure she wanted to have to have a reunion that she didn't want to be at.

"Well, everyone from the old troop. This was planned a while back for everyone to get together." Milly said, Isabella remember receiving a letter from them, she never bothered opening it. If she had, she wouldn't have ended up here.

"Well I didn't mean to crash a party for you guy's troop." Isabella started towards the door, and someone grabbed her shoulder.

"It was your troop Isabella, you formed it." Addison had made her appearance while she was leaving she supposed, and in all rights she should have taken over the troop and not Milly.

"I left it behind, like I left everything else behind. None of you were keeping up, and I had to keep going or be destroyed. Simple as that." Isabella brushed the hand off her, and reached for the door knob.

"Izzy," so it was true, even Gretchen was there. When Milly had said, 'everyone' she thought that implied Gretchen too, but she thought Gretchen would have told her if she had planned to attend this thing. "Izzy, they are sorry, you know? And they want to make things right again."

So her only friend she had left, no longer understood. Isabella had thought Gretchen understood it wasn't the Fireside Girls that caused her to feel like she had. Maybe Gretchen had just thought Phineas was an excuse for her real feelings. Stupid girl, "They can't make it right for me Gretchen. None of you can, so enjoy your breakfast."

2

The next couple of days Gretchen had tried coming over, and each time Isabella told her through her bedroom door that she didn't want her there. The other girl had pleaded with Isabella, said it wasn't that big of a deal. Even went as far as telling her that she, Gretchen, thought that Isabella had planned on going as well. That obviously wasn't true, Isabella had made her view very clear where the other girls were concerned, and stopped even talking to Gretchen through the door. She really did want her friend back, but… she just couldn't trust her any longer, and why should she?

Of course it didn't stop Gretchen from texting and calling her, it started to bother her how often she had to decline a call, before she started getting texts. Her mother had agreed to let her do her schooling online so at least she didn't have to ignore Gretchen at school. It had been a simple argument, with no friends at all, and without lunch, and other classes she could focus on more work. Her mother seemed to like the idea, her mother also knew that unlike most kids with that option, Isabella never skirted on her work. It was one of the only things she worked at, it kept her mind busy, and away from all the problems she faced.

In her alcove, wearing nothing but a t-shirt and her underwear she lay looking out her window, the heat still unbearable, sadly her room didn't stay as cool as the rest of the house. She had been like this since she took a shower. It seemed much bigger when she was younger, and shorter but now she had to curl her knees up to lay in it. Her head propped up on a pillow she took from her bed. She watched children playing in their yards down below, not a care in the world… and yet so mellow.

She thought back to times when her and her friends, and Phineas and Ferb had done things together. Riding their bikes going here or there, it never really mattered, these were the less extreme times in their past. Days at the museum just looking around, the few random moments she was able to be alone with…

"Mija?" her mother called from her door, and she was snapped back into the present… she supposed there were worse places to come back to… to bad she couldn't think of any.

"Ugh! Yeah Mom?" Isabella called back moving into a siting position she knew soon her mother would come through the door.

"Someone is here to see you," Her mother said, someone is here to… geez couldn't they give it a rest? Everyday she got phone calls and text messages… couldn't she have one day to herself.

"Send them away…" Isabella laid back down looking out the window, her door opened she sighed. "Ugh Mom, I just don't," she turned over expecting to have to have this conversation with her mother again, for what seemed like the millionth time. But it wasn't her mother, it was Phineas. He was staring at her, and for a moment she just stared back. "Can't you just give up?" she hissed at Phineas, "Are you seriously such an idiot that you don't know when to stop? I'm not some back yard invention that you can tinker with until I work again, I'm not broken damn it." That wasn't entirely true, she was broken inside… but she wasn't going to admit that, not after saying that.

"Whoa, your mom said, you said to send me in…" Not send them in, send them away… doesn't ANYONE listen anymore? Then just like with normal Phineas he changed topic just as quickly and as natural as people breathed, "You know you're in your underwear right?"

She looked down realizing that where she was laying her t-shirt had ridden up. And a pillow hit Phineas in the face as she screamed for him to get out, lucky for Phineas, or unlucky for her the book she had hit the door where Phineas' head would have been if it hadn't closed so fast.

"When I say I don't want anyone over, I don't' want anyone over," she muttered to herself shoving one leg into a pair of jeans, that she didn't WANT to wear because it was hot, pulling off the t-shirt and putting on one that fit better, that she didn't want to wear because still it was hot. She looked in the mirror as she walked by her hair had frizzed slightly, luckily it no longer frizzed like it used to when she was younger… this wasn't a social call, she didn't have to look pretty to tell him to get out. Then she opened the door, he was still standing in the hallway.

"Now that I'm completely uncomfortable, what do you want?" Isabella snapped, and walked back into her room, she didn't invite him in, but she didn't want to have this conversation in the hall.

"I just wanted to come over to see how you were feeling and all, I hadn't seen you in a while." He said, then finally handed her the pillow that he had been hit with, she assumed he caught it before running for the door. "Nice throw by the way."

She put a hand over her face and sighed as she sat in the chair in front of her computer, pure idiot. Okay lets try this another way. "Phineas look, I'm… feeling alright, but I don't think you've understood me very well… hell maybe you're like everyone else and only hear what you want… either way we need to talk, Alright?" She decided she wasn't going to comment about the throwing remark.

"Alright," he stood there waiting, great how was she supposed to start this. It dawned on her that he had never been in her room before, his gaze shifted from place to place as he waited, and she wondered what he was looking for, before she had a chance to explain anything to him, "Your room looks different than I imagined," his eyes stopped at her again, "and your hair still gets frizzy."

Does he have A.D.D. or something? "You know it's kinda odd knowing someone has imagined your room… and of course my hair still frizzes up, genetically I'm the same, idiot." Maybe he was one of the few people that bordered the edge of insanity, sadly she knew that it wasn't true, thought it would explain a lot really.

"I didn't mean that I imagined it… I just always assumed…" he started, his face turning red. Once she would have thought that was cute, well it was still cute she thought… she shouldn't be thinking that. Not with him in her room, and so close to her.

She shook her head to try to clear most of those thoughts from her mind, "Look Phineas I told you the other day at the school…" he wasn't looking at her, he was looking past her.

"What are you writing?" she turned her head, she had bumped her desk causing the computer to turn on, an open document up on the screen. Her personal writing that she did to vent her frustrations. Some might refer it as a diary, but this was so much more than that. She turned off the monitor, his attention now on her.

"Quit stalling Phineas," she snapped, hitting her fists on the arms of her chair, why was he stalling. She was sure he knew what she was going to say, maybe that's why. He might not be ready to give up on this crap…

"I'm not stalling, I'm trying to make conversation." He snapped back. That shocked her a second. She stared at him, and in her mind she reassessed the Phineas that she knew. He never got short with her before… or anyone that she could remember. Not even the two boys Thaddeus and Thor, who she remembered to be pithy and rude. Isabella took a deep breath and counted to ten.

"I told you at the school Phineas, the Isabella you knew is gone. Gone." He just stared at her as if he was looking for something, her heart fluttered a bit under his inspection. Then she muttered, "Stop it." To herself

"I didn't even say anything," he said, and she shook her head. She hadn't meant to say it aloud, she was trying to stop herself from acting foolish.

"I know, but look nothing can work between us alright? I told you, your too good for me, you need to go on with your life…" she said looking down at her feet as they moved back and forth waiting for his response.

"So you just want me to accept the fact that… your different," she nodded, "Move on because I'm 'better' than you?" same response… Maybe he wasn't as idiotic as she assumed, "and you want me to accept that I can't be your friend either, and I should 'move on' with my life because you have?"

"I-I can't be your friend Phineas… look around you at my room." She waved her arms indicating everything around her. And waited for his response, when he said nothing she just sighed. "What missing Phineas? Pictures of friends, little gifts that would be displayed on shelves or something, little things… None of it's here. I don't do friends anymore… it doesn't work out."

He moved closer, way too close her body was warming up, her head was swimming. "You say you've moved on, what you just said proves you haven't moved on Isabella. You've stopped and refuse to keep going." He knelt next to her so he could look her in the eyes evenly. Why did he have to do that, he was way, way too close.

"Look… I have to go…" that was her usual go to response when she was in a awkward situation… who would have ever thought she'd have to use it in her own house. Obviously he was just as confused, as she was embarrassed, "I mean, you have to go…"

His hand grabbed hers and refused to let go. Her heart now threatened to beat right out of her chest. She loved the way he was looking at her. While she wasn't used to people being around much, she was used to some kind of human contact when Gretchen had been around… she wasn't going to be pulled in by this… Not again she refused.

"Isabella, please… I listened… I understand what you're saying. But…" But? No way, no buts. She meant what she said, "Now I'm asking you to listen to me, hear me out. That's fair right?"

Yes, it was fair. She didn't want to be fair, she didn't want him this close, and she sure as the sun doesn't shine in hell want him touching her… but it seemed right now she didn't have a choice beyond throwing him out. And she was saving that for if she didn't like what he had to say. "Okay I'm listening, but it's not going to change anything Phineas."

"Isabella…" his hand felt so warm on hers. She pushed that thought out of her mind, she had to listen to what Phineas had to say, she had to at least give him that much… Wait… when did she have to give him anything? He didn't give her anything but grief… "I'm sorry I never noticed how you felt… wait… I know you forgave me. I don't care, I feel bad about it. I see what it did to you, and now that I know… now that I know… I want things to be different."

She didn't know what to say, how could she? This caught her completely off guard, seriously she assumed he was going to come up with some lame excuse for why he did it. She didn't take into account that he held himself responsible for it. He took her hand in his, holding it, obviously waiting for a reply of some kind.

"Isabella, I want more…" he leaned closer, his lips brushed against hers… she didn't know what to do… she couldn't, couldn't…

"No! Stop!" she sat up in bed, her arms went to shove something away. When her eyes opened, she was alone in her room, and it was dark… a dream just another stupid… twisted dream. They had came more and more since she hit her head, she didn't think that hitting her head was the cause, it was Phineas that was the cause, but she couldn't blame him it wasn't like he was doing it on purpose. But she was still mad at him.

Isabella sat in the alcove looking out her window as she had for the last week, watching others go on with their lives. It was October now, and Halloween on its way. The hottest part the summer was winding down, and cooler air was replacing it. She had always liked that holiday, the one day of the year you can be anything you ever wanted to be. She and Gretchen had been planning their costumes, but now all that was gone. She had no one to do anything with, which is why she stayed in her room.

Oh she wanted her friend back, but she couldn't force herself to trust her anymore. It was only a small, simple thing like a meeting with old friends, but still Isabella thought that she should have at least been told. These were the girls that had looked at them like they were freaks when they left. They didn't care after she left, and didn't seem to care when Gretchen followed suit not long after. Maybe Gretchen was foolish enough to accept just an apology, but she wasn't that much of a fool. They think they can help me, idiots.

"Mija, I'm going to the store do you need anything?" Her mother called from the other side of the door. Isabella thought, though she couldn't think of anything she might need.

"No, I don't need anything," Isabella replied, her voice sounded hoarse, she hadn't spoken in a few days. That wasn't uncommon for her even when she was hanging around Gretchen, most of their talks existed outside real life, and consisted mostly in texting, unless she was here or Isabella was at her house. She was alone. It didn't really bother her that she was alone, some people didn't like being alone. But during this time, she knew that she had a couple hours of just being the only one home. She could go down for a drink in her underwear if she wanted, she never did or wanted to, it was just the thought she could that was comforting.

She continued looking out the window, Phineas seemed to being doing better. Not that she cared one way or the other but he seemed to be doing more, her mother had said that he still decided to go back to regular school. She still saw him from time to time. Ferb of course had returned to the private school he started at, her mother said that he was a shoe in for aerospace, if she only knew what he could do… she would be so shocked.

Phineas was washing the car across the street, she would have once swooned over the boy doing such a thing. But now she just turned away from the window, and picked up a book. She tried to get interested in it, but failed. So she started picking up stuff in her room, wadded up paper that missed her trash can, put cloths in the hamper. Made her bed, all the while thinking of the boy across the street, the one she couldn't have… wouldn't allow herself to have. She didn't even want him anymore, she told herself time and time again through out the weeks since his party. But still her mind wandered to times where she would stare at him, her heart would jump a little.

Tear streamed down her eyes now, without any warning. She was sick of her emotions running things. She wanted them to end. Not for the first time her mind wandered to suicide. At first it had only been something to think about, nothing she'd really do. But as time went on, and as she thought about it, it seemed to be more of an appealing thought. No more emotions, no more sadness, she wouldn't have to worry about what anyone thought of her, yeah okay there were no happy thoughts either but it wasn't like she had any. She said she didn't care what anyone thought, but that wasn't true, each time someone looked at her as if she was a freak, trash, garbage it hurt her, leaving yet another scar on a heart that didn't seem like it could, or would ever heal. She had researched many ways to do this, all of them frightened her away from suicide except one. For her there was only one acceptable choice if she planned that route, overdose. It seemed the least painless, go to sleep and that was it… no fear, or pain, just forever sleep.

She had gathered some pills for this, she kept them in a small jewelry box she had been given. Funny how there was never any jewelry to go in it. Why did people give such impractical gifts, why give someone a box to hold crap you didn't wear, people were idiots. Then again who was she to judge, she was a freak sitting alone in a room she had been closed off in for months, thinking about killing herself. But like other times, she put her hand over the pill box and muttered, 'Not yet.' Her main fear was that she would do it, and it'd take weeks for someone to notice she was gone. At first she thought no one would notice, but then figured after her body started stinking they'd notice… and well she didn't want to be found rotting… just seemed disgusting.

With nothing else to do in her room, her schoolwork for the week completed, and it wasn't even Tuesday yet. Her room clean, well clean enough for her. No one to talk to, and the fact that she had been in this room for so long she decided she was going to go and do something. Maybe go out to eat something, or sit in the park and watch different people be happy. Anything, she was starting to go stir crazy.

She changed into a black skirt, and matching shirt. She didn't bother with makeup, who'd notice anyways right? She grabbed her phone, and made her way down stairs. More text messages, when she looked at her phone. I wish they'd just leave me alone, she thought. She stepped out, the last time she had been out it had been way to warm for her, now she wished she choose something different aside from the skirt, it wasn't freezing, but the breeze was more than cooling under her skirt. She like being cool, but certain parts of her body liked to remain warm, and one of them right now was getting cool air blown around it.

"I haven't seen you at school." A voice called from the street, it was Phineas, she didn't even need to look to know she'd know that voice anywhere.

"Yeah, I do it online." She huffed, she had wanted to go in and change to keep her nether region warm, but now she was going to have to make a bee-line for wherever she decided she was going to go. "I have to go to the store."

"Yeah me too, mind if I come along… as far as the store anyways." He said looking over at her, his smile wavered more as she stared at him, but he didn't back down.

"Suit yourself," she grumbled and walked on, assuming he was following her. She didn't bother to look back, and hoped no one assumed that she was with him by choice. It was silent for a while, so she figured maybe he got the hint she didn't want him around and stayed behind.

"So, no makeup today?" nope didn't catch the hint, or he completely ignored it. The first thought infuriated her, the second intrigued her.

"Why bother right?" she whispered, not sure if he heard her or not. Didn't really matter.

"Well, I don't know much about makeup," he appeared next to her, he looked at her. Her cheeks turned red, why did he have to look at her. Was he stupid and not catching any hints? "But I think you look better without it."

"Why do you have to say things like that, now?," Two months, he's had two months to get over all this, and he was still trying to make amends, she forgave him didn't she? Then muttered, "and not before."

"Cause its true. You do." He moved in front of her stopping her in her path, she cocked her head to the side. What was his deal, I thought he had somewhere to be.

"What?" she snapped, as he stared at her, it was making her really uncomfortable to be stared at.

"Isabella, there's no other words I can think of that can help fix what I did, or rather what I didn't do. This is all I have left." In a few heartbeats, she was in the position she had wanted to be in with him, his arms around her, his lips pressed against hers. It was so magical… or would have been if she expected it. She didn't fight him, nor did she return the kiss. The thought hadn't crossed her mind, no thought did. She was frozen there like a fool, then the kiss broke, and her mind seemed to take a moment, but it did restart.

"The hell is wrong with you Phineas!" she growled, and glared at him. He looked shocked, did he honestly think that what he was doing was… she didn't even know. "I finally managed to get over you, I finally managed to move on. And you… you… have to come back and ruin everything I worked for. Open every box of emotions I locked away." Tears streamed down her cheeks, everything she locked away flooded out with that kiss, she couldn't stop it, and it was too late. The dreams that she had been having all flooded her mind, and it was too many emotions for her to handle, "I don't want to do this anymore, Phineas… No matter what happens… just… I have to go."

She started running back towards her house, she wasn't aware of anything around her. Why did he have to do that, she could have held herself together if he didn't kiss her. That one thing, something so small and simple blew up her defenses, and her control… well what control she had left.

She was back in her room, the door locked her jewelry box in her hand, 'It's time' she said to herself. She never really planned on doing it. It was always there, a choice she could make. It was never about doing it, it was about having a choice, being able to do it if she wanted to. Now she had a choice, deal with everything that was unleashed or kill it all. She pulled out her phone, sent a single text. To someone that she needed to know it wouldn't be his fault. She didn't feel like she owed him anything, because in reality it was his fault, but even with so much confusion, she couldn't be that spiteful.

She took the pills from her jewelry box and washed them down with a bottle of water. Her tasks done, she laid on her bed, if the internet was right it would take about 30-45 minutes for her to start getting sleepy, then after that she'd sleep, then maybe an hour after, maybe she would be gone. Everything around her seemed so surreal. It was like she was dreaming, but wasn't. Her mind was numb and emotions shut off. She knew it couldn't be from the pills yet. Maybe… her mind just couldn't take it anymore and just shut them off, but now without those emotions banging around in her head… she started to realize what she had done… but now it had been long enough for her to start to get sleepy. She was going to die, and she was calm, scared as hell, but calm.

She heard banging on her door, heard yelling and screaming. She started having regrets now, she was scared now… but it was too late, she couldn't force herself to get up she was so tired. Tears ran down her cheeks, she knew the voice that was yelling now, it was so sad. She shouldn't have sent that text until right now, if she had thought about it a moment she would have waited… actually if she had of thought… she might have reconsidered.

"Isabella! Open the door, please!" it was Phineas, she knew he'd figure it out but her door was locked. It wasn't a text for attention, she just didn't want to go without saying something.

"Phineas…" her voice was so soft, she hardly heard it. She wished he could have… maybe she wouldn't go without regrets… can't have everything. "I lo …" Everything became dark as sleep drew closer her, she heard something break, she couldn't open her eyes, they were too heavy.

"Izzy, wake up… Izzy… Isabella…" she heard him plead with her to get up, she was awake… for now but she couldn't do much. Then he was talking to someone, her address, told the person she was breathing… she didn't know how she knew… her mind… it was fading and nothing really made sense. "Isabella… please everything will be alright. Just… just hold on."

She thought about those words, 'everything will be alright. Just… just hold on.' He was assuring her that things would be alright, did he think this happened by accident? That she tripped and fell, and the pills landed in her mouth? She did this… it was too late anyways. And what was she supposed to hold on for, for more miserable days and nights? More people looking down at her, because she decided she wasn't going to just be another cog in what they called humanity? She wanted to think more, she did… but her mind darkened. This is it, she thought.

When her eyes opened, everything seemed bright and white… Heaven? People who committed suicide didn't go to Heaven… and their stomachs didn't hurt, and their mouth didn't taste like chalky disgusting crap. Her sight was blurry, and nothing looked right… Maybe being dead wasn't all it was cracked up to be, the bright light was hurting her head. Her hand moved up to cover her eyes, at least she still had hands… she had wondered before, what a soul would look like. Maybe I look like I did.

"You're awake," someone said, a familiar voice, she placed it right off the bat, but decided that couldn't be right because he wasn't here. Then figured it couldn't be anyone else, unless the 'creator' had a really cruel sense of humor.

"What are you doing here?" she snapped, angry that even in death he was still able to bother her. Couldn't she have a few moments of the peaceful quietness death was supposed to bring before he chimed in.

"What am I doing here? Well let's see, I managed to get into your room, call 911 wait with you until they got there. Since I'm not family I couldn't ride in the ambulance, so I got on my bike and pushed and pushed to get here, so you wouldn't wake up alone and scared." He said testily. That's right he managed to get in and save her, and spoke with her. She should have never sent a text to him, even if it was to clear her own conscience. Then it dawned on her what his words meant.

"I'm alive?" she sobbed, this wasn't fair. This wasn't fair at all, she finally got up the courage to do it… well there wasn't much courage, it was a spur of the moment thing, but she failed… like everything else.

"Well you wouldn't be if I didn't break in your door." Phineas said, his anger seemed to have reached its end, putting his hand on hers, as tears went down her cheeks, "Your mom is on her way, I got ahold of her not long ago. Everything's going to be alright."

Idiot, he thought she was crying because she was scared that she wouldn't live? She was crying because she had failed, nothing was going to change. Nothing at all, and even worse she wouldn't get another chance again. After this her mother will be watching her closely, if they didn't have her committed that is. And being committed would be… would be… who was she kidding? It would be just how I spend my days now. Locked away in a room, only difference she wouldn't be able to just go out when she felt like it. "Leave me alone."

"It'll be alright," Phineas' soothing voice wrapped around her, some of the medication must have still been in her system because things were still blurry and she was dizzy. Her eyes closed, and she didn't notice him leaving.

When her eyes opened again her mother had showed up, she expected to be yelled at, told she was stupid for trying to do what she did. Her mother just cried and held onto her, apologizing for not paying attention. Said she didn't know what she would have done without her. When the nurse came in, talking about having Isabella committed for an evaluation… she'd never seen her mother act like that. Never heard her use those words. In the end, Isabella would return home. If it happened again, she would be committed.

She was getting dressed into her clothing that was brought for her, seems she became sick in the ambulance and were… un-wearable. She stood in her underwear when her old friends walked in, she cursed her mother in her mind before thinking her mother didn't have a reason for stopping them, except that she could have been naked.

It was a swirl of words and people trying to hug her, she… as politely as she could she counted to ten, tried to grab onto some kind of control, she stood up straight, having found her composure, then lost the battle and growled. "Let me finish putting my clothes on. You guys are… are… I don't even know what you are."

"We just wanted to make sure you were alright, when Stacy's mom texted Ginger that you were here. She's a nurse here, you remember. Well…" Gretchen started, this was the first time Isabella had talked to, let alone seen Gretchen since the troop house. She hadn't given up her dark clothing for her former bright ones. That was at least tolerable, she looked at Ginger, "she told the rest of us. What were you thinking, Izzy."

"That I don't want to be me anymore." She sat in the chair that she had her foot on tying her shoes, she put her head in her hands, and felt the tears run down her face into her palms, she wasn't sure what was wrong with her, these girls were the enemy, and now she was here bawling. All the fight had seemed to have been drained out of her… well most of it. "I don't want to do it anymore. I think something is wrong with me."

"Nothing is wrong with you," Katie said moving next to Isabella, putting an arm around her. She was about to shrug it off when another arm laid on her other arm.

"That's right," that was Holly.

"You just let things get to you. You just let… yourself think that Phineas never noticed you because something was wrong with you." Milly always the insightful one, "When you should have realized… he's a boy and he was too occupied with making everyone's summers the best ever, including yours."

"You're still our friend, Isabella. Even if you pretend we aren't." Addison's voice came from near here somewhere.

"We don't want to lose you Isabella," Ginger said, when Isabella looked up they were all around her. She was reminded of days long ago, when she would be down and they picked her up. Somewhere along the way she slipped and fell and was too stubborn to let anyone help her up, or maybe she just fell to deep for them to reach her. "I mean you haven't been around, and when you changed…"

"We were a little afraid of your new attitude," Katie continued, "That we just… I don't know. We didn't think you wanted us around. But even so there was always a chance you'd come back…"

"But not if you died, we'd lose you forever." Gretchen finished, these girls loved her. No matter how much grief she threw at them. No matter how mean she was, they had missed picking her up once, they wouldn't this time. She realized no matter what she was stuck with them… but she hoped on her own terms. She kinda liked the solitude of her life, maybe she could tolerate breaks to be with people now and again.

"Fine," she wiped her eyes, but put her head back in her hands as her body shook more, now she was sobbing. One problem was fixed, but the other problem… the main problem. How was she supposed to fix that? Phineas had kissed her, and she couldn't handle it. She wasn't sure if she even wanted him anymore, or if she was just tired of being alone.

"But… Izzy…" Gretchen started, and waited until she looked up at her, "Phineas is pretty angry, I think you really scared him Izzy."

"He's an idiot," Isabella muttered, to which most of the girls giggled thinking it was funny, thought Gretchen didn't.

"I'd have agreed with you, once. But now… I mean I'm kinda angry too." Gretchen's eyes watered, as she continued. "You tried to leave us all, without a goodbye. I mean I think I know why you did it… and you didn't think about what would happen if you succeeded. But we would have all been crushed."

"I…" was she really going to tell them that she told Phineas goodbye? She had too, maybe they'd be mad and leave her. But she felt like she had to tell the truth. "I told Phineas goodbye, and that it wasn't his fault."

"Why did you tell him?" Gretchen asked, and Isabella took a shuttering breath and explained all the events that happened up to when she took the pills.

She started when she first was told she had to attend his party. Explained her feelings of rejection, and anger, and then explained about the something that built inside her, until she burst in the yard. The hospital, and how she had given Phineas the wrong box by mistake. And then the night Phineas was missing how she felt and how she forgave him, but still had to try to make it up to her. Went into detail of the night she feel asleep on the couch in the Troop House.

It got harder and harder as she got closer to what really triggered her. The kiss, from Phineas. She couldn't explain it, one minute she was happy, then sad, then angry and all the while confused. Happy because she had always wanted it, sad because of what she had been missing out on, and angry because he never paid her any attention until now… until she didn't want it anymore, and confused because at the same time she didn't want it, something inside screamed that she had to have it. Which… she didn't even remember much before taking the pills. She explained why she had them that they were only there for peace of mind. Just to show she had the control and could whenever she wanted to. Then she stopped, they had come full circle and was at the beginning again.

"Wow… that's a lot to take in." Gretchen said, and the others agreed. Isabella just nodded, maybe they did understand.

"And to deal with," Holly said, and the other girls nodded in unison… it was always creepy when they did that, even when she was in the group with them.

Even if only in theory, they understood at some point, and that was a start right? They helped her up, even though she didn't need it. She allowed herself to be guided out of the room, and down and into her mother's van, where they all followed her. With a weight in her stomach, she also noticed… Phineas was no longer there, no longer waiting.

You wanted him to leave you alone… you got what you wanted, she told herself sitting in her little alcove looking out at Phineas' house. It was November now, and Ferb had returned from his school to celebrate the upcoming holidays. She had seen him return, but it was her mother that told her he was coming. Her mother had just started trusting her to be on her own for longer than a few minutes, unless her friends were over. Because she had told her that Ferb was returning, she waited for Phineas to come out, maybe to greet his brother, or go with his parents to pick him up. He never came out, she hadn't seen him in weeks… She spent most of her time here in this alcove, doing her school work in the alcove… And slept here most of the time as well, she only ever left to eat, when she didn't eat up here that is, and the bathroom and bathing. Her life for the past few weeks was there.

She wasn't feeling happy, and she didn't want to live anymore, but she didn't want to try suicide again… her stomach had hurt for a week after leaving the hospital, and most of what she ate at first wouldn't stay down, all in all it was a horrible experience. Not as bad as dying though, she told herself.

Her friends would show up from time to time though out these past weeks, at first she thought only Gretchen would show up, that the others only agreed to it because it was the 'right' thing to do. But the first time Milly showed up with Katie, and without Gretchen, she thought she might be wrong. The girls had started helping her to open her heart again, and start to see and understand what she really wanted, but the boy across the street didn't seem to care anymore. She had truly messed things up for herself, it seemed an endless cycle. She wanted him, he ignored her. She ignored him, he wanted her… she wanted him again, and he's no where to be found. Life is cruel, she thought.

"Hey Phineas, want to come over?" she heard a voice from outside, she crawled into the alcove, and looked out the window. It was someone she didn't recognize but Phineas waved them off. She hadn't even seen him out of the house in two weeks, she thought about what her friends told her about… opening up more. She had made some progress. With each time they came over and talked with her, the more she felt… human again. Familiar feelings had started returning to her about the boy across the street, and it didn't always make her mad or frustrated, she hadn't begun to swoon over him again, but there was definitely something.

She grabbed put on her boots, and darted down the stairs… maybe she'd just go over and try to talk with him, she hadn't seen him since the hospital… well physically seen him the dreams she had still plagued her, and some of them… she blushed at the thought. No, just talking with him… those were dreams, she said to herself. She closed the door behind her, maybe a little harder than she intended and semi jogging to the road. Phineas noticed her, and started to go back inside.

"Wait," she called, he hesitantly looked back to make sure she was talking to him, when she started towards him again, he stopped walking and stood there waiting for her.

"Hey, Isabella." He said rubbing the back of his neck, what was wrong with him. You told him to leave you alone, she told herself.

"Uh yeah hey… Look I wanted…" she wasn't sure what she should say, she never had to explain this crap before. "I just wanted to… I don't know… talk or something."

"You want to talk? With me?" he just looked at her, he didn't seem excited more weary, "What did I do this time?"

"No… no, you didn't do anything, I just… I've been talking with the girls… and I… well I was wrong for a lot of reasons. And I wanted to just…" she threw her hands up and sighed, "I don't know! I just want to feel normal again."

He said alright, and they both went behind the house, it looked more normal now without all the party stuff. They sat under the tree, both trying very hard to keep the small talk going. Isabella talked about the online school work… about some of the things her and her friends had been working with, about some of their talks. Phineas, talked about school, and how Ferb was.

"Oh and Jeremy proposed to Candace." Phineas said, obviously he'd just remembered. At one point she would have been there when the news was given, so it was easy to forget she didn't know.

"Aren't they a little young for that?" Isabella asked, then again she was eleven when she first started fantasizing about marrying Phineas… Who is she to say they are too young.

"Well Candace is nineteen now, and Jeremy is twenty and the date isn't set for another year or two." Phineas said, then looked over at Isabella. "I was wondering, Candace said that she had been planning her own wedding for years… I found it kinda strange, and she said all girls did. Do you have a plan for a wedding."

Of course she did… once. Now she didn't think that anyone would marry her. Most people still saw her as a freak, and the only guys interested in her wouldn't be interested in marriage. Only one thing would attract guys to her. Enough of that… your supposed to be over that and trying to be happy now, she told herself. "I did, once… that plan won't be used… But I did have a plan."

"Oh… maybe Candace isn't weird if you had a plan for it." He said looking up at the sky, she wondered what he was thinking, though she didn't have to wonder very long, "In your plan… well I read that book… a lot and I was wondering, was I part of your plan?"

She didn't want to answer, when she convinced herself to come over here this wasn't part of the deal… Just answer him, her mind snapped. "Uh, well… you read the book, you should know." When he just stared at her, obviously he didn't want the book to tell him, he wanted her to say it. "Yeah, you were in that plan… but like I said that plan is gone."

"Why? What if that's what I want now Isabella?" she looked at him as if he sprouted a second head.

"Because… well… because." She should have been happy, it just no so plainly said he wanted to marry her… didn't he? Sadly her mind wasn't ready for all that, "Because I told you, it wouldn't work. We are too different, and you deserve better than me."

"Who are you to decide what's good for me Isabella?" he yelled, he stood up and was pacing in front of her.  
"Maybe I see the flaws you have, and don't care… I mean even back then I had a lot of flaws obviously, and you didn't care…"

"But Phineas…"

"No Isabella. You wanted me, I'm here. I want to be with you…" he said he was still pacing, her heart was racing tears running down her cheeks, blurring her vision. She wanted this so bad, why couldn't she let herself have it? Was she really that much of a masochist, that she'd rather be in pain? It had been a while and she hadn't said anything, she couldn't think of anything to say. "Fine Isabella, just go home… I know that's going to be what you said next anyways."

"Phineas…" she looked at him, she loved him, she wanted to tell him run to him… cling to him and beg her to forgive her… but that's not what came out of her mouth, she glared at him, "Fine, just leave me alone then."

She went down for Thanksgiving Dinner with her family, stayed only for the first part. Her family didn't understand her, and of course they all knew about what they started referring to as, 'The Incident'. How could they understand what she was going through? They all seemed perfectly happy, and with people that cared about the. Yes her family cared, but that was different than what she wanted, what her heart wanted. Soon she found herself back in her room sitting in the alcove watching Phineas' house, for the boy that she missed, and was mad at her.

Christmas was fast approaching, she went around with her mother to do shopping for this and that. She buys presents for her friends, and Candace for trying to be helpful, and Ferb because he's Ferb, and even though they haven't spoken in years, not that Ferb did a lot of the speaking even then… but he always bought her something each year, it always said from him and Phineas, but she knew it was souly Ferb's doing. She was stumped about Phineas, if she should get him something or not, she doubted he wanted anything from her to begin with. But maybe he did, maybe if she found the right… something he'll notice her, when she wants him Finally she stops in the middle of the mall, tears tickle down her cheek. For someone that's supposed to be tough, I sure cry a lot lately, she thought.

"What's the matter Mija?" her mother noticed she had stopped and led her to a bench, waiting patiently for her to say something. She had been bottling this up for a while, even with the girls. But she didn't know what she should do, so she turned to the one person who, besides Phineas, always had an answer for her.

"I… don't know what to do… Mom. Phineas… I don't know what to get him." Tears streamed down her face, what a sight she was, only a few days before Christmas, a time when she should be happy for all she had. She sat saddened by the one thing she only recently realized she still wanted. "I don't even know if he wants anything from me."

"I'm sure that's not true, Mija." Putting her hand on Isabella's, then patting it softly. "Friends fight sometimes Mija. Family's have fights, husbands and wives fight… And even two people that care about each other fight. It's always going to happen Mija…"

"But I don't know what to do Mom. Everything is all… I don't know… it's all messed up." Isabella felt more tears run down her face, and she again was slightly happy she had given up using make up.

"That's the hardest, and easiest part Mija," her mom smiled softly and kissed for forehead, "You have to know when to apologize, that's the only way a fight will end."

"How am I supposed to apologize? I hardly see him, I haven't even spoken to him in weeks… he's never outside anymore" Isabella hiccupped, and glared at people that was staring at her.

"Didn't you tell him to leave you alone Mija?" she asked, she had. Who would have thought he'd listen that time. Isabella only nodded, and put her face in her hands and cried.

"Yes, I did." She put her head in her hands and wept some more. She hated crying, she hadn't cried since before that party in a long time. But it made her feel better after she cried, well as better as you can feel when you don't have what you heart is begging for.

"I can tell you, that he did leave you alone, like you asked." Why was her mother rubbing it in? Didn't she know how bad she felt for telling him that, and him listening to it, after he had ignored it so many times before? "But he has come over to the house, Mija. Almost every day he comes over and asks about you."

He comes over and asks about her? When? She never saw him… unless it was when she was doing her school work. Or reading, or possibly been while she was sleeping, she had been doing a lot of that to pass time. "He really comes over?"

Her mother nodded, it made he feel worse, for some reason. She had thought… been thinking that he was too angry to bother with her. She didn't even think he had listened to what she told him to do. She had been so upset because he was again ignoring her now that she was coming back to life, that she didn't even realize that there might have been a reason. A reason that he hadn't come over… well come over and her know about it.

They wondered around the mall a little more before Isabella found something she could get for him… She wasn't sure what he'd think about it but she went into the store. When she came out, she had what she bought already wrapped with his name on a label. It didn't look like much, and it wasn't very big. But she hoped he liked it all the same.

As the day arrived, she put on her clothes and her boots, and marched through the snow from her house to Phineas', carrying the presents she had picked out, and the ones her mother had sent over. It reminded her of a Christmas vacation that was long ago where they all played outside watching the parents exchange gifts for the kids, and she smiled, the first real smile in a long time, making her way to the front door of Phineas' house. She knocked on the door and waited, each moment making her more and more anxious and worried about what awaited her on the other side.

"Isabella!" Candace smiled opening the door, Candace helped by taking some of the packages and lead her into the living room. Mr. and Mrs. Fletcher both smiled, and waved. Ferb sat in the corner and nodded he smiled too.

"It's good to see you again Isabella, how are you feeling?" Mrs. Fletcher asked, she expected to be asked about the hospital, but was relieved when she wasn't. That's what she had liked about Phineas' family they never judged anyone.

"Hello Isabella!" Mr. Fletcher smiled, he didn't talk much, unless you got him started on antiques, which she wasn't going to do unless she was really curious… and had a few hours to kill.

Candace really matured over the years, and had at least mellowed. She handed out the gifts until only one remained in her hand, and she clutched it to her chest as if she was afraid it might take off. Phineas hadn't said anything the entire time she was there… she debated on if she should give it to him, or just run out the door.

"Who's that one for?" Candace knew, she was many things, but stupid wasn't one of them. Candace looked over to Phineas. "Hey Phineas can you grab me a soda while I talk with Isabella?"

"Sure," and in a flash he was gone, no doubt he'd stay in there as long as he could. Trying desperately she assumed to listen to her command to leave her alone.

She stood there until she felt a hand on her bottom pushing her towards the kitchen, "Go on. It'll be less embarrassing in there." Candace said, and then Isabella looked around the room, at all the faces staring at her, all of them smiling. Her face on the other hand turned red, and she wasn't smiling, she felt like she was going to be sick.

"I don't know if… I think I'll come back…" then she was shoved into the kitchen. She turned to leave when the door shut in her face… Damn Candace.

"Isabella?" Phineas' voice came from behind her, she turned and looked at him. He looked worried, and took a few steps back. "Sorry, I'll go in the…"

"No wait…" why was this so hard? Just tell him you were wrong! Tell him you want to… what? Then her mother's voice drifted in her mind, 'You have to know when to apologize, that's the only way a fight will end.' The tears started again, this wasn't going to be pretty. "Phineas I was… wrong. I should have… Here." She thrust the gift into his hand and pushed the door behind her with her back… it didn't open oh it tried, meaning someone… she assumed Candace was holding it closed.

"Are you sure this one is really for me?" she looked up at him, a slight smile on his face. He was making fun of her… she just nodded.

She watched him open a gift, this time it was meant for him to have. Waiting and wondering what would happen. He stared at it… she looked at the gift, it was a picture frame, with a picture of her in it. She had sat there in that photo store to have it done. She didn't think about not having on makeup, or wearing anything nice. It was just her. "I'm sorry, I… didn't dress up. It was… I know I'm not pretty in it or anything."

"No… you're right. You're not pretty in this picture." The tears started again, she even heard a gasp from behind the door, which moved a bit now. Meaning Candace had moved… obviously she was as shocked as Isabella was. The exit was free, but her legs wouldn't move. She felt all the work she had done, all the progress she had made with her friends crumble.

"Oh… oh okay, I-I'm sorry." Her legs felt funny, she went to step back her legs gave out from under her, and she hit her back against the door, and her bottom hit the tile floor. For a moment she could see all the faces in the other room, Candace's hand over her mouth, eyes wide and apologetic, as tears ran down Isabella's face, and the door closed behind her bumping her back softly, taking all the shocked people out of her view.

"I've never thought you were pretty…" He was kneeling next to her now. Okay this was going to hurt, but she guessed he deserved to say something, she had degraded him, and berated him. "Even back then, I always thought you were well… you're beautiful Isabella."

What did he say? She was beautiful? No she had to have heard him wrong, or this was some kind of messed up joke. She hit her head on the door, and was delusional. "Wh… What did you say?"

"You're beautiful, in the picture, and even more so in person…" his hand came up and wiped a few tears from her cheeks, and helped her up. "Even now, you're beautiful, wet… but beautiful."

He was really close to her, her heart was beating faster, she heard a knock at the front door. She heard voices, saying something then several people shushing them. She was close enough she could smell the shampoo he used, which only made her face heat up. "I…I…" she started crying again, she didn't know what she was supposed to say, and now she looked like a complete fool who couldn't even string a couple words together.

His arms wrapped around her and she didn't fight it, didn't even want to, instead she clung to him as the river of emotions tried to pull her under and he was all that kept her above. She buried her face in his neck, this was what she had been craving, this is what was missing… she always knew it was… she just didn't know it would feel like this. She had almost forgotten what it was like when she loved him… her memories only showed a pale reflection.

"I'm sorry Phineas, I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean what I said that night. I was just…" her voice muffled with her face buried in her neck, she knew that his neck and shirt would be wet now… she'd apologize later.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry too Izzy, I was so frustrated that I wasn't able to..." he cut himself off, maybe he wasn't sure what to say, she pulled her head back to stare at him, to look into his eyes. His lips pressed against hers, this time she wasn't angry, or confused, or even sad. This time she wanted this, craved it. She kissed him back passionately.

The door behind them opened, neither of them so much as moved as whoever it was came in to see why it was so quiet. The door closed seconds after, Isabella if she had been able to think at all, would have assumed they didn't quite expect what they found, and fled. She didn't hear the cheering outside the door, she didn't hear what everyone had to say about what was happening in the kitchen…

When the kiss finally ended, after what felt to Isabella like a very happy lifetime, they looked at each other. Neither of them would be the same after that kiss, Isabella would never feel the same as she had before, it wasn't like any of the others, she was able to emotionally appreciate it without freaking out, she was, to say the least happy. They indulged themselves with a few smaller kisses, obviously not sure what to say at the moment, until someone on the other side of the door cleared their throat.

Isabella turned her head, his arms refusing to let go of Phineas now that she had him. Candace stood there, a big grin on her face and in a sing-song voice said, "Buusssted!" Isabella and Phineas couldn't help but laugh, which was joined by others outside the kitchen, "Now since you did the whole kiss and make up thing… literally… Others have shown up, come on out there are still gifts to open."

Isabella hadn't thought about gifts this year, and right now she had what she wanted and was sure nothing in some brightly colored paper wrapped box could compete. But her and Phineas went out into the other room, where not only sat Phineas' Family, but her Fireside Girl Friends, and her mother. She wondered if this all had been planned before she arrived, or if it just happened. Or Candace could have called them over after she found them kissing, she wasn't sure how long they had been in the kitchen indulging themselves in kisses Sure felt like a long time.

Isabella looked over to Candace, and gave her congratulations about the news she had heard since it was the first time she talked to Candace and remembered the engagement.

"Thanks Izzy, I was thinking… maybe you could be a bride's maid." Isabella nodded, and obviously she had forgotten about Phineas being so close… it felt too normal to have him so close even though it wasn't.

"Speaking of plans and weddings…" Phineas' voice came from beside her. She looked over at him, Candace did too, since they were the only ones paying attention to Phineas at the moment. "You think you might revive your plan for me and you Isabella?"

"What? We are way too young to be getting married," she said in a high whisper that no one heard but Phineas… and well Candace.

"Who said anything about getting married now? I just said we could plan it… doesn't have to be soon. The longer we plan something, the better it'll be right?" He smiled and took Isabella's hand again.

"Alright, since you asked, I'll tell you. I'm planning on working on that plan again… but you can't back out," she looked over at Candace, "Candace just witnessed you asking me to marry you… not in so many words but yeah."

"I know what I just asked… I might be young still… but I don't think how I feel about you will ever change." He kissed her hand, "Look what we already went through… anything else will be easy."

"So," Candace smiled, leave it to her to be the one to ask this question, she expected it from Phineas, but well she had an answer for it and was ready, "Do you still think Phineas is an Idiot?"

Isabella smiled back and shrugged, "Yeah… he's still an idiot…" most of the people gasped, and Phineas just looked at her slightly shocked. But the next words made them all smile, laugh, and again cheer. "But, he's my idiot… and I love him."


	3. Authors note concerning the story

Greetings and Salutations readers of 'Isabella is that you?'

This story was originally intended to be a one shot, but as I wrote things developed more and more in my mind. And what had been only 7k words or about didn't seem like enough. Unlike my normal fictions that took me hours, and a day to write, this one took me a couple days, not because it was complicated… but because every time I read and re-read it, I altered parts, embellished parts, and expanded. What had initially been Chapter 2 was supposed to be the conclusion to the story… But I found it too hard to let go. So I went back again, and again, altering and adding and finally made it so I can add Chapters between the two, luckily unlike my Time Travel Fan Fiction, I didn't go too greatly into detail with the passage of time, and was able to turn what had been months later, into days later and continue on with the story.

So I ask you to keep in mind the conclusion to this story had been prewritten, and scanned and scanned time and time again. This has become the ONLY Fan Fiction I have ever written and read over and over. I'm not sure why, but I want this one to be perfect. It holds a lot of feelings that are close to me. So I'm not saying it's set in stone… But I will say the very last part of this story is pre written, while I MIGHT make tiny changes to fit things that I've added in between, it will remain the same, and believe me, I do not find this ending… wanting it has everything you could hope to end a story, and read at the end, including a way to continue with a sequel, or two. I know the sequel could keep me going, but I felt a lot of emotions and feelings needed to be addressed during this Fan Fiction, so I know I usually get my storys out pretty quickly considering my current situation as some of you might know about, No check yet from the insurance, so my stolen objects have not been replaced. But I ask you to bare with me a little, and follow this story…

Also soon I will be starting a blog or whatever it's called here. And I ask all of you that are a fan of my stories to follow, and or favorite it. As that is how I will be addressing stories, future fan fictions, where I'll add polls for which story to start working on next I have several ideas all ready to start. It's also where I'll address story problems and which stories might go on hiatus until ideas began flowing for that one again.

I thank you Greatly for your time,  
Forever,  
Am Sadi, The Sadist.


	4. Chapter 4

(Phineas' PoV)

It had only been several weeks since that Christmas day, when Isabella and him finally apologized and made up, for everything said between them. Isabella had started returning back to the sweet girl she was, but she was only starting. There were still times when she would push him away, and yes it frustrated him. During those times there was no way to explain how much she meant to him, and her hear it how it was meant.

It had happened five times, since that Christmas that she would push him away, and say she had to go. Only a fool wouldn't realize she was still having issues, oh she had changed a lot since that night but he knew it wouldn't be an instant thing. She had spent three years guarding herself, and throwing up boundaries to protect her feelings and heart, so he couldn't ask her to change all at once it wouldn't be fair. It usually took her a couple hours to come back over in tears, saying how sorry she was. He always accepted because he knew it was tough for her, even more so for her to come back each time and apologize.

That morning they had fought, he and Isabella had been in her room. She was sitting in her alcove by the window, it had easily become her sanctuary, the place she would go whenever she was nervous or scared… or just wanted peace. He was sitting in her computer chair that he had rolled next to where she sat. He wasn't entirely sure what she had been thinking about… when he moved to sit next to her. He leaned in and kissed her, and she shuttered. Then pushed him away from her, and he fell back his bottom landing on the floor. She looked as shocked as he was. She started to say something, but the fall had hurt. Phineas had gotten angry and said he should just go home, he didn't mean it to come out as harsh as it had. He had only meant it would be best if he went home, to let both of them cool off.

Isabella hadn't taken it that way, and snapped at him. Told him that he was right, that he should go home and not come back. The words shattered his heart as it did each time she said something harsh. Normally he'd leave and wait for her to cool off, but this time his temper had frayed, he stopped and turned looking to Isabella who had already started calming down, and said maybe she was right, maybe he shouldn't come back. And he slammed the door behind him as he left her room. He wanted to turn around and apologize the moment he heard her sob from behind the door. However he was still angry and he didn't trust himself not to say more hateful things and just walked down the stairs.

While he understood why Isabella would push him away, she had explained the feelings each time. Even though he knew he also would say things that he didn't really mean out of hurt. He knew it was a human response to say something out of hurt that you didn't mean, didn't mean that he didn't feel guilty afterward.

Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro was at the bottom of the stairs, obviously she had heard what happened and was waiting for him, she didn't look angry. She looked sad, and she stopped him at the bottom of the stairs.

"Phineas, please… she's been doing much better, she's really trying." she just looked down at the floor, not really sure what to say.

"I know… I know, it's just frustrating. I'm going to come back, I will I just need some time," Phineas said and tried to smile, he wasn't sure if his words were more reassuring or the smile, but she did let him past.

Back in his own room, he sat on the edge of the bed his head in his hands, this was always the worst part of one of these fights, the guilt that came from the fight. Today was worse because he had snapped back, he had let his temper get the best of him. He wanted to go back now, but after saying what he said he knew that she would be more upset than he had been. He was sure… he hoped that she would understand that he didn't really mean what he said. That there was a reason, a stupid reason, but a reason he said it.

He never thought Isabella's reasons were stupid, she was still trying to fit in again… It was like repainting a puzzle piece, then putting it back into its former puzzle, she belonged there… but didn't fit the rest of the picture. She was working on it, he knew it and was proud of her for trying so hard. However he wondered if she would ever fit in again, or if everyone around her would change to complete the picture.

He was sure that Isabella would come over soon enough, and they could make up again. Except she didn't come over, she didn't call, or even send a text. He was worried that she would spiral back down and all the progress she had made was ruined. He picked up the picture frame, she had given him on Christmas and stared at the picture of Isabella. The smile looked forced, but she had tried to smile for the picture. Her hair was slightly messy, and you could tell by her eyes that she had been crying, and she looked adorable… Is this the only way I'll ever see her smile again, he asked himself.

He kept himself busy most of the day in his room, always glancing out the window to see if she would come over, or get the courage to go over himself. He wanted to go over and apologize, but if she was still angry… going over before she had a chance to calm down could cause more problems then it would fix. When she was calm she'd come over, he hoped.

(Isabella's PoV)

"I should just go home." His tone was harsh, and he was mad… of course he was mad she had just pushed him. Something she regretted even as she was doing it, but she couldn't stop her body from reacting. She wanted to apologize, but his tone ate at her emotions…

"Fine, maybe you should go home, and not come back." Again, something that caught her by surprise, that wasn't what she wanted to say at all. Tears started streaming down her cheeks, as he stopped and turned to her. But the look on his face wasn't what she had hoped for. She had hoped he would say he didn't want to stay away… but he was angry she could see that.

"You know your right, maybe I shouldn't come back." He slammed the door, as he walked out. What have I done? She thought to her self, and started sobbing loudly. What could she do? She just finally pushed him away… he wasn't going to come back. Everything she worked for… gone with just ten words, ten stupid words she shouldn't have said.

"Phineas," she whispered as she heard the front door close, and watched him walk through the snow to his house without even looking back. She laid down watching his house from her little alcove, a blanket wrapped around her completely only her face visible. Seconds turned to minutes, and minutes to hours… then time seemed to just stand still.

"Mija?" her mother had come into her room, she barely made any indication that she heard her, Isabella didn't move, couldn't move she had to watch… Phineas was just angry… he'd come back… he would… "Are you okay?"

Isabella just shrugged under her cocoon, and laid there. She wanted Phineas to come back. Her mother left the room, and she wanted to cry… but she was too numb to cry, to numb for anything really.

Her mother managed to get her to come out of her room to eat dinner, telling her that she had to because she had refused to eat lunch. So she ate with a single minded intensity. The faster she ate, the faster she could get back to her little safe place. It didn't take her long to finish what was put on her plate, though her stomach lurched on the last couple bites, being upset could affect your stomach. She didn't care, she ate that's what she was supposed to do… if it came back then it did. She got up, and went slowly back to her room. She needed to lie down, that's what she needed. It would help settle her stomach, and she'd be able to see if Phineas came over.

The only problem was, he never came. This was it, she completely ruined everything like she always did, and the worst part of everything was… she had no one to blame this time but herself. She had blamed the Fireside Girls for some of her problems, then blamed Phineas for ignoring her… but now she had no one but herself to blame. "Why am I like this? Why can't I just be normal? Just be happy? Why do I have to ruin everything?"

As the numbness wore off, her tears found their way down her cheeks, soaking into her pillows the soft crying of hurt, turned into sobbing of pain as she watched his bedroom light go out. He wasn't coming, he really was angry with her. She had hoped that he would calm down, and come over and she was too scared to go over there… what if she freaked out and made it even worse? All she knew was what she felt after trying to commit suicide, didn't compare to what she felt now… she thought him not knowing she existed other than someone to help him was bad… it didn't even compare to him being angry at her.

She wasn't sure how long she laid there after his light went out, it felt like hours. It had started snowing again, she watched the flakes drift in the breeze for a while. Maybe I should have gone over there, she thought… I always go and apologize… but this time he was angry. I'm afraid if I go over there he'll still be mad and… and… it'll be over completely, she thought and continued to, but if I don't go over there… and he never comes back… it truly will be over. I'll go over in the morning.

What if it's too late then? She asked herself, then got up franticly looking for a pair of pants, shoved her feet into her boots, and then found her jacket. It must be late, she thought as she walked through the house and down the stairs. The lights were off, her mother was sleeping or at least in her room. She quietly moved the living room, and out the door. There… now I just have to get over there… and inside. The snow and wind stung her cheek as she walked across the snow covered lawn, and street. Her heart fell when she finally realized all the lights were out at Phineas' house.

"Fine," she said to herself, "There's more than one way…" she eyed the house, looking for an entrance, and she eyed the latter leaning against the side of the house, she remember Mr. Fletcher had been doing something before it started snowing, and had never moved it. She could get in that way, but… she'd try something else that wasn't so dangerous first. She tried the door that lead into the garage, it was locked… so was the back and front doors… she glared at the latter, now she was scared for more than one reason. She put her hands on the cold metal of the latter wishing she had thought to bring gloves, and slowly climbed it step by step careful not to slip on the frozen rungs.

"Easy part over…" she whispered now at the top of the latter, and looked at how far it was to Phineas' window… normally it wouldn't have looked so far, it was only about five feet away, but now it was covered with ice and snow. Instead of chancing slipping and falling, she crawled over the latter and crawled with her body against the snow, her body was freezing. "I should have waited for morning, this is so stupid, he's going to think you're stupid."

After what felt like an eternity of crawling across the snowy roof she made it to his window, luckily he and Ferb didn't share a room anymore. Honestly she hadn't even thought about that until now. She looked through the window, he was sleeping. She was shivering it was so cold, her chest was numb from crawling across the snow. She couldn't go back, she was sure she pressed the snow on the roof down enough it would probably be ice now. So left with just one choice, she knocked on the window.

Phineas moved on the bed, she knocked again and he sat up looking around. Come on, she thought as she knocked again, "Phineas…" her voice was soft, and she hoped he heard her but she didn't want to wake up anyone else. He looked to the window and slowly came over.

"Isabella? What are you…" she opened the window and helped her in, she was shivering, and her teeth chattered so much she couldn't even say what she wanted to say. She was surprised that her tears weren't freezing. She just stood there, looking down at the floor, and watching as the snow that was on her body turned to water dripping on the floor. "What where you doing out there Isabella?"

He didn't seem mad… "I-I-I," her mouth wouldn't work properly as her body shivered, his hand reached out and touched her arm, and he yanked it back.

"How long were you out there, you're freezing." He took off her soaked jacket, she was completely soaked from the melted snow, and it was all freezing cold… and she wasn't sure how long she had been out there, it didn't seem like a long time… but time was not her friend tonight. "Hold on… I… I have something." He went to his dresser, and got some things, and was back putting cloths in her hands. "Here put take off your cloths and put these on… please."

She watched him turn his back as she painfully pulled the ice cold items off her body. Even her bra and panties were soaked… making sure he still wasn't looking she pealed them off as well, not wanting him to see them she stuffed them both into her pant's pockets. She put the shirt on over her head, it felt a lot warmer compared to what she had just taken off, and the shorts he'd given her was a pleasing for her nether region that didn't like to be cold at all. She still shivered, as she touched his arm.

"What were you doing out there Isabella?" he asked and gathered up her cloths, when she didn't answer he walked out the room, with her cloths and came back in a few seconds later. He took her hand, his hand felt like fire compared to her cold one, and lead her to the bed. He didn't come back in with her cloths but he did have a towel that he started to dry her hair with. "You could have hurt yourself out there."

"Are you… still mad at me?" she was still crying, she was sure that he didn't know because of all the water that was dripping from her hair onto her face. But she was sure he knew now from the sound of her voice.

"I'm mad cause you could have hurt yourself, but I'm not mad anymore about earlier," he pulled her close to him and wrapped his arms around her body, he again felt like fire but he sucked in air deeply. "You're still freezing."

Before she knew it, she was wrapped in a thick blanket and he was holding her… he wasn't mad anymore. She leaned her head against his chest and felt better. "Ph-Phineas, I'm sorry for pushing you. I don't know why I did it."

"I told you, I'm not mad anymore." His hand caressed her cheek it didn't feel so hot now that her body was warming up again. "I'm sorry I said I wasn't going to come back. I didn't mean it."

"I thought you did, that's… that's why I came over here. I didn't want you to go away. I don't even know why I said you shouldn't come back. It was all my fault. I don't know why I…" the entire time her voice was breaking, and finally it cracked near the end as she started sobbing. She turned her head into his chest her arms clung around his body

"We both said things we shouldn't have Isabella, and neither of us meant them." his voice was soothing as he rubbed his hand across her back, she barely felt it but it comforted her to know it was there. Her sobbing subsided, and just became sniffles as he unwrapped her. He laid her down on his bed, her head on his pillow. She just looked up at him, as her get in bed next to her. Pulling the blanket over them both. "It's too late for you to go home now, plus your cloths are still soaked. Tomorrow we'll see if Candace has something to lend you until we can get yours dry."

His bed wasn't made for two people to sleep in it, but it made it more comfortable. She lay on her side, her cheek against his chest, as he lay on his side with his other arm over her waist. This was comfortable, she thought and indulged herself in thinking that that was what it would be like if Phineas and she got married, she had always wondered about this part. The sex part she thought wouldn't be so bad… she just worried that finding a comfortable position with another person in bed, would be difficult. But it wasn't, he seemed comfortable, and she was more than comfortable.

"Good night Isabella." Phineas kissed her forehead softly, she lifted her head kissing his lips. She knew what this might lead to, kissing in his bed… wearing nothing but his cloths. But honestly she didn't care she needed to kiss him, needed to feel alive. Oh he was very passionate with his kissing, and his hands did wander places, that she was sure she was blushing. But he never went farther than that, and she knew… that he wanted to, but she kinda relieved when he stopped, she knew it might lead to sex, didn't mean she wasn't nervous. She admired his self control as he kissed her again, she smiled

"Good night Phineas…" her eyes started to drift closed, and would open every so often then finally flickered shut and just before she went to sleep she muttered, "Next time, Phineas…"

"Phineas… get up Isabella is missing she left in the middle of the night" she heard a voice, who was it? Was it Candace? What was Candace doing in her room? She felt something move next to her, and she sat up…

"Who's missing?" Isabella rubbed her eyes, trying to focus on the girl at the door of… this wasn't her room.

"You're…" she stuck her head out of the room, "Mom she's up here… uhh… well just let Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro know that Isabella is safe…" she walked into the room and closed the door. Phineas had woken up and was staring wide-eyed at his older sister.

"It's not what you think Candace." Phineas said waving his arms back in forth in front of his body. She was utterly confused, her mind wasn't fully awake and she still didn't know who was missing.

"Explain." Was all that Candace said, and Phineas explained the fight they had… then explained that he was asleep and heard Isabella knocking on his window and let her in. How she was so cold and dripping wet that he had her change into some of his cloths, and it was too late to send her back home, that they were going to wait until morning and see if she could borrow something from her, that she could wear until her cloths were dry. He spoke so fast, that Candace had to have him repeat some parts over… and each part of the explanation her mind came closer and closer to realizing that she had been caught sleeping in a boys bed, after sneaking out at night… and all she could do was sit there, looking like a fool nodding.

"Okay… I believe you… Mom and Dad might not though. I don't know, never did this… so not sure." That was not a comforting thought.

(Authors Note: This is a multi PoV story, seems in the last part of this some people wished they could have known what Phineas was thinking, as what the PM's I received says, this first part doesn't have much Phineas in it, next part will have more promise. As I said my computers were stolen, and I don't have a way to communicate at home. I did have my phone, but something happened with it, and some reason it doesn't see 's credentials as secure anymore so I can't even check reviews anymore. But I realized I CAN still use my phone to check reviews and PM's via e-mail. So I ask all of you who wish to PM me, please e-mail me at Syro_Odious , that way I can at least reply to you. Again, I cannot access the site via my phone, so I cannot reply to the PM's, I only repeated it so you'd know that I wasn't ignoring anyone.

And to those that mention my grammar errors, some of it is mistakes, due to me changing an idea in the middle of typing something and forgetting to fix it. I keep telling myself I'll fix it after this sentence… I'll fix it after this paragraph… I'll fix it when I'm done with this mind set… and by then I forget to fix it. Also I don't go back and read my own fics until after they were posted, and then I only read enough to get back into the right mind set. I have to alter my mind set, as I write more than one fic at a time. Currently I have 4 other stories, and about to start this one, and one called De-Aged.

And as I do in each and every authors note, I'd like… no love to thank each and every reader. All my stories combined have over 3k views, for which I am stunned and honored, as I've said before this was just to get past writers block, and now I find myself spending more time with fanfiction than with my own original stories. I never imagined how much fun it would be to write fan fiction. I don't want to offend anyone, but I used to think it was really nerdy, which I guess is why I enjoy it so much. Some of my personal stuff had to be… less depressing, or less this or less that, or more something… This way has enabled me to release a lot of pent up emotions I didn't have a vent for.

My sister Maso is a beautiful person, but… she's sensitive and I can't vent on her without spending the next three days apologizing for it. And my daughter… Aside from being my pride and joy, she's way too young to vent on, and wouldn't really be fair to her.

Am Sadi)


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 1

(Isabella's PoV)  
Isabella sat in her alcove, it was about four in the afternoon and she hadn't bothered to change from the clothing she slept in. Who was she going to impress now that she was alone again? It had been two months since she had went to Phineas' house to apologize to him for a fight they had. Isabella had ended up sleeping in the bed with Phineas that night. Nothing had happened between them, other than kissing and some light petting. It was a great night for her, and Phineas she was sure. However, Phineas' parents and her mother had gotten upset about the night. They bother explained how innocent that night had been, though they didn't believe them. Both parents decided that they should spend some time apart. No matter how much she yelled about it her mother wouldn't give in.

Her alcove had become where she lived now, she hadn't slept in her bed since that night. She even refused to come out of it, or her room for that matter on her birthday, which she would have come out if her mother would have said Phineas could come over. This was the only place she could see Phineas. Even if it was just through her window, she could see him and he could see her.

She could understand some parents getting upset over their daughter sleeping in a bed with her boyfriend. But she wasn't just anyone, and Phineas was not a normal guy, they all knew that. Weren't they the ones that tried to get her and Phineas back together? So what was the big deal? Nothing happened, and it was just one night. If anything they should be happy that Phineas made her change into something warm and dry, made her stay there instead of risking getting sick after being wet and going back into the cold. Happy that he didn't just leave her out on the snowy roof after she had pushed him. But no, they decided to destroy the one thing she had that was helping her put her life back together.

It was April now, the weather was warming up, and the flowers were starting to bloom. A time she should be with Phineas enjoying walks, the sights, and most importantly each other's company. Their parents had said they should take some time to be apart, but whenever she brought the subject up that it had been two months now... her mother ignored the issue and just said, a little longer won't hurt. It already hurt... it hurt the moment they said it, and hadn't stopped since. Her phone beeped.

It was Phineas, they could still text each other without someone telling them they couldn't... so far, anyways. It wasn't the same though, she had just gotten used to him again, started truly falling back in love with him... words on a phone was a poor imitation, but it was all she had.

'Hey Izzy, how are you today?' she stared at the words on the screen and imagined Phineas saying them, imagined how he would have looked... it wasn't that hard... she just wished that it wasn't just words on the screen.

'Not enjoying lock down,' Yeah to top it all off, she was grounded so she couldn't sneak off and meet Phineas by saying she was going to Gretchen's house, or one of her other friends. If she wanted human contact they had to come over. This is stupid.

'You're still grounded too? Only way I can go out, is go to school.' She didn't even get that much, since she had managed to get her mom to let her go to school online. And saw through her wanting to go abck to public school again.

'Yeah... I'm so tired of this. They wanted us to be together, then wanted us to slow down... I'm tired of this crap I feel like I did before... except now the girls come over. I feel just as much alone as I did before.' She loved her Fireside Girl friends, but they only helped so much. Each of them now had a boyfriend, or girl friend in one case, and hearing about things they get to do with them only made Isabella more depressed.

'You're not thinking about suicide again are you?' She didn't get mad, it was a reasonable question after what had happened last summer. She never told him that the after effects of the overdose, threw her mind so far away from suicide that she'd never attempt that again.

'No, I'm just tired of people making rules for me, Phineas.' she looked out her window, and could jsut barely see Phineas standing at his... the cruelest part of this was that she could see him, talk with him, kinda, but they were seperated by two windows, two yards, and a road.

'You look pretty today... I can't really see you well, but you're always pretty.' Isabella smiled, he knew how to make her feel good even when she wanted to scream, most of the time anyways.

'Na I haven't showered today or brushed my hair or anything... no point.' Oh she knew what was coming and it was what she was fishing for... she needed it today. Whenever she put herself down, he would always argue with her.

'You're ALWAYS pretty Isabella. No matter what, you're always beautiful to me.' There it was, just what she needed.

'I love you Phineas... we should run away together,' a thought that she used to think about when they were younger. Running away together, seemed romantic. She never thought about the down side to all that. Neither of them had jobs for money, neither had anywhere to go. It seemed romantic, foolish but romantic all the same. She had said it a couple times to him before, and she waited for him to give her the same response as always.

'I love you too, Isabella,' that came fist, she wondered if he had gotten tired of answering the second part... it wasn't something she was looking forward to seeing, just Phineas was a creature of habit, and he always did the same things. 'Lets run away.'

She laughed... oh she expected him to tell her that it wasn't logical, or that there was too many reasons why it wouldn't work, she hadn't expected him to tease her about it. It was a nice change though, she had forgotten that Phineas, while mostly about logic and careful planning, had a whimsical side. She decided to play along, 'Lets go to...' Where would be a fun play to run away to, she asked herself in mid text, she had always wanted to go to Japan, '...Japan.'

She waited for his responce, giggling to herself. Now he was going to tell her how silly it was. He was going to go from whimsical to logical in a second, her phone beeped, 'Too far...'

Too far? What was he talking about? Maybe he was texting someone else and sent that by mistake, 'What do you mean too far?'

'It's too far away for us to run away to. We need some where we can go, that we can get to by land.' Wait... what? She laughed and fell back, she hadn't expected him to keep going with it.

'Okay, how about... Gretchen's family has a cabin. It's about an hour's drive maybe more from here, they only use it in the winter, is that a good start?' Two could play this game, and it atleast pulled her from the depression that she was in. It reminded her of all the times she was the one planning insane things that wouldn't happen when she was younger. It was a bit more fun with Phineas involved.

'When should we leave?'

'How about today?' Whatever the punchline to this joke was, she wasn't going to be in it. He was going to be the one to give in first. 'In an hour or two?'

'Can you get all the stuff you'll need ready by then?' Wait... he wasn't serious was he? No he couldn't be, this was way way beyond what Phineas would do.

'Wait... Phineas... are you serious?'

'Yeah, you want to be with me, and I want to be with you... it's the only choice.' He was being logical... but not like she would have assumed. She wasn't really sure what to think. She just looked out the window at the boy she loved. Then another text came, 'Think Gretchen would give you the key, and not say anything about it?'

Gretchen would keep the secret, she had kept all the other secrets and she might give her the key... but Phineas couldn't be serious. She had money saved up, but no where near what they'd need for a week, let alone longer. Of course she could always take food from here but that would only delay things for a few days, maybe a week, maybe. Plus they had no way there they both were fifteen, Phineas had a learner's permit but that was all. She didn't even have that, or a car Phineas' grandfather had bought him a car, but someone would notice it gone obviously and it of course people would be looking for it. Maybe her insanity was rubbing off on Phineas, and he wasn't thinking clearly. She looked down at her phone as it again beeped.

'So do you think she would?'

'You're serious... serious about this?' Her heart fluttered, this was pretty romantic, insane but romantic. 'I'll ask her, but how would we get there?'

'They car granpa got me,' she had called that one, she didn't bother pointing out that they would be looking for that car, once they noticed her and Phineas were gone, she was sure he knew that.

'Okay... um... what about money for food? What about things like lights, and cooking and storing food...,' she didn't want to stop this planning, she wanted to do this... and was scared at the same time. But these things she had to know, had to ask.

'I have the lights covered, where ever we go, and I have the money that was refunded from my school. We'll figure something out Isabella, we have to... I can't be without you anymore.' Words she had wanted to hear for so long, even in her deep depression for those few years, she had wanted... no needed someone to say they couldn't be without her. Coming from Phineas, only made it so much more appealing.

'I'll call Gretchen, I'll text back soon...' she crawled out of her alcove... she'd miss it, but Phineas... she needed him. It was a feeling so deep inside her that she couldn't explain. But something inside her said she needed to be with him, and that this was the only option. So she started packing things into a black suitcase she used when she visted family, as she called Gretchen.

"Hey Izzy, what's up?" Gretchen answered, the music in the background was turned down a bit, Isabella assumed to hear her better.

"I have a... HUGE favor to ask you Gretch, and even if you say no... I need you to not say ANYTHING about it." Isabella waited, she'd know in a moment if she would even say anything. Gretchen was straight forward, mostly. And if she couldn't keep a secret, she would say so.

"Anything you need Izzy, if I have it it's yours, you know that." Isabella sighed in relief and explained what she needed from her redheaded friend, and explained why and what she and Phineas was going to do. She expected to be laughed at, or told she was insane. "Me and Katie had been wondering when one of you would jump to this option... didn't think you'd think of the cabin though, but yeah we won't say anything and come by to get the key... when are you guys leaving?'

"Today..." she stopped as she put more of her underwear into the suitcase, thinking she'd need the other two suitcases to bring cloths too, plus her laptop case... she'd never packed to run away... how was she supposed to get all her cloths with her... or at least the ones she wanted. "I know I know, its... we just thought about it... and well we are going for it."

"Gotcha Izzy, um just stop by here pick up the key," Gretchen than told her good luck and that she'd see her soon. At least this was working out, she texted Phineas telling him that all they needed to do was to pick up the key, and that Gretchen wouldn't say anything. His reply came back, that that was good, and he was packing now.

Her three suitcases, two of which were not small, were now packed tight the biggest didn't even zip all the way closed. Her laptop bag next to them. Her pillow and blankets, she wasn't sure what might still be at the cabin. She had rounded up all her bathroom items, and personal items she would need. She sat on her bare bed trying to think of what else she would need, because she only got one chance at this. She looked at the other two suitcases, and one smaller case... maybe she wouldn't need all of them.

"Mija, I'm going to the store I'll be back in about an hour." Her mother called up the stairs. Good she had been worried about how to get everything past her mother, he had thought she'd have to lower them to Phineas from her window. She went to her window and watched her mom pull away.

It took her two trips to get everything downstairs, and she took one of the empty ones into the kitchen. She took things that wouldn't spoil on the ride there. Cereal, canned food, some silverwear because she didn't know if there would be any there... better safe than sorry right? She grabbed a couple boxes of matches and candles her mother used for bad weather, just incase Phineas' plan for power was held off til morning. Again, better to be safe. Nothing else, her entire life was in five bags, one laptop bag, three suitcases of cloths and papers, and the fourth food. She texted Phineas, a couple minutes later someone was at the door.

"Hey Izzy," he said the moment she opened the door, and his arms were around her. He was trembling softly, she wasn't sure if it was from holding her for the first time in two months, or nerves because of what they were about to do... if she had to say she would think a bit of both. Over his shoulder she could see his car running in her driveway... this was really happening. "Lets go before we start to realize this is crazy."

At least she wasn't the only one who thought that they were crazy, they both carried the bags out to the car, Phineas put them in the backseat with his stuff, only saying the trunk was full, she didn't care. She looked back at her house, and got into the car with Phineas. Phineas looked out his window, Candace stood there watching... so it was only a matter of time before she called her parents. She walked to the road, and when Phineas backed up he stopped next to his sister.

"See you later Candace." Phineas said, and to Isabella's surpise leaned in and hugged her little brother, then just smiled at Isabella.

"You two be careful, no i'm not going to say anything. I think they went way to far with this. And over reacted, just let me know how you guys are... and if you need anything... call me." This wasn't what she expected from the girl she knew as Candace, yeah she had calmed down and mellowed a bit with age... but she couldn't imagine this girl keeping a secret like this. "Take care."

Isabella looked back at Candace waving, this was really happening. This was really happening... it was scary, romantic, insane, and thrilling all at the same time. "I can't believe we are doing this."

"I know, exciting right?" Phineas said as he turned down the road that would lead to Gretchen's house, Isabella though found it really hard to just stay still, this had her heart racing. And she was practically bouncing when they reached Gretchens house. Since most of the parents, knew that Phineas and Isabella wasn't supposed to be together Isabella texted Gretchen to meet them outside. Gretchen came out, followed by Katie. Isabella didn't think anything of it, Gretchen and Katie had started dating... something she didn't even know about Gretchen before, it didn't bother her. She was just shocked when she found out.

"So you're really doing it?" Gretchen leaned into the open window, hugging her friend. Then looked over at Phineas, "Take care of her... everything you need is at the cabin. The power is on, my parents never have it disconnected, and we haven't used it in a couple years. With the money my parents make, as long as you don't like... use a crap ton of power they'll never know. There is like canned food there, nothing in the fridge though, at least I hope not after this long." She made a face and put the key into Isabella's hand, and then handed her the address, "Make sure you call me, Izzy. You remember how to get there?"

"I have a GPS, hopefully we put in the address and it'll take us there." Phineas smiled, "Thank you Gretchen, you don't know what this means to us."

"Of course I know, or else I wouldn't be giving it to you, risking all kinds of trouble,"

"Oh come on, you'd do it for the thrill alone, and you know it." Katie snickered behind her,

"Oh shut up... alright I would. But this is different this is for Isabella's happiness... and Phineas' too." Gretchen snapped playfully. "Hey why don't you ever do wonderful things like this for me?"

"I thought what I did for you was wonderful," the shorter girl smirked, and Gretchen's face tried to turn the same shade of red as her hair.

"Quiet you, now you two be safe. Call when you get there, the security alarm's pin number is on that paper so don't lose it, if you do call me before you go in the house, or else your fun's over before it starts." Gretchen hugged Isabella again, and patted her arm. Phineas pulled away, and Isabella watched Gretchen get smaller and smaller until she was out of sight.

"Here we go," Phineas pulled out onto the highway, leaving Danville and all the rules behind them. It was liberating, it was thrilling, new and exciting. And at the same time leaving everything you knew... was scary.

Author's note:  
(My Microsoft Office is being idiotic, for those of you that do not know, I am the Typo King. And I've yet to dig my dictionary out of a box somewhere. So There may be typos that are above and that follow or errors (even more than usual, anyway). So Until I get it fixed or just go buy another copy of Office, or Word... (speaking of which if any of you could point out a good program that has a good gammar and spellcheck I'd appreciate the reference.) If any Beta's are reading this, and would like to be a Beta writer for any of my stories until I get this resolved, pm me here. Or e-mail me at Syro_Odious as I have to fix a Security Error on my phone so I can go to again... (Yes trouble all around for me.) I can check it through my phone, my e-mail I mean.

I'm willing to accept Beta's for all my work on FanFiction, my original books and stories that are to be published are checked by an editor at the publisher, at least until I get a good program again, all except my 'Breaking Point' and all it's sub stories, that will be taken up by 'Destiny and Fate united'. From what I hear a very good and talented Beta reader, I'm not sure if Destiny will be willing to do any others. But I will ask if any Beta's are a fan of one of my series, and do not already have a large work load, to pm or e-mail me.

And when I say I want a Beta reader, I'm not sure how some of you work. Like with the editor that does my personal works, he changes some things, moves things around to fit a 'time pattern' in his head... (Me and him has went round and round over him changing something that 'HE' thought would be better.) I just want gammar errors resolved, and words corrected. If you, as a Beta, see something that could be altered to better fit the story... I'm alright with that... just I'd rather be asked before hand. I don't have a huge ego that makes me think my stories are the best, I'm not I make many, many mistakes. I'm completely open to Ideas to make things flow flow better, I might refuse it, or use it... or even work an idea around to fit how we 'both' can see it working. I realize that if I had the computer access I did when I started, I was putting out chapters often, like every other day/night, but since my stuff was taken I've had to rely on when I could do it, and putting them out that fast, I don't have time to read everything, cause I've started something else, my mind is wired different. I have to get the idea's out while they are there or they are gone... I can tell you I have about 20 uncompleted original book ideas that went nowhere because I allowed myself to wait... and my brain just said, bah I don't need these ideas anymore, and made a threepoint shot into the trashcan. I thank you for your time. I'm typing this now, two paragraphs into the story, so it feels odd to type this, but I will. Now enjoy the story.

Am Sadi, The Sadist )


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 2

It had gotten dark during the ride to the cabin. Good thing they had the GPS, Isabella couldn't quite remember the way in the dark, and a few of the roads she DID remember, they wouldn't have found if the GPS hadn't told them when to turn. Phineas had pulled into a small general store once they entered the small town where the cabin was, Phineas said it would be a good idea to get what they needed now, while they were there. They had never had any long long term time together. So she was rather surprised when they both liked a lot of the same foods, she knew that a lot of couples had foods they liked the other didn't. But that just only proved that her and Phineas were meant to be.

Once everything was paid for, they were once again on their way. She remembered the cabin, when she visited that first summer after leaving the Fireside Girls with Gretchen being closer, maybe now that she was more anxious to get there time was just going lower, or the road seemed to get longer. Either way she was again bouncing in her seat, hardly able to wait to get where they were going. When they pulled up, Isabella checked the address to make sure it was right, it looked right, but then again most of the cabins out here looked alike. It surely seemed bigger than she remembered, then again she never really paid attention when she had visited and it was now dark. She looked at the paper, and read the four digit alarm code, then unlocked and opened the door. She went to the keypad and typed it in disarming the alarm. All that was left was to bring everything in, and that took less time than they imagined. They put what they bought in the fridge, the stuff that needed to go in there anyways and set out to put the stuff Isabella brought with her into cabinets along with the other stuff that had been left there.

They had debated on sleeping in the same room a while, before both decided that maybe... for now it would be better to just sleep in sperate rooms at first. They cooked and ate their first meal alone together, and cleaned up after together. They stood out on the front porch looking out at the night sky together, there were dark clouds, and lightning in the distance, but that didn't matter, such a simple thing like just being here alone looking up at it... Isabella knew she would remember it for a lifetime.

"So Izzy, what do you think so far?" The air was still a bit chilly, and now that they were farther north, the air had a little more bite to it. She didn't care, this was a magical night. This would be one of the nights she'd remember forever.

"I think... it's perfect." he wrapped his arms around her, and for the first time in two months they kissed. Two months of built up passion burned through their bodies as they kissed. It felt like a lifetime before they finally pulled away from each other... just away from each other enough to breath anyways.

"I think it's time for bed." Phineas said when Isabella yawned, he checked his phone and frowned. She really didn't need to be told what he saw, she knew what it was. "They realized we left a couple hours ago, I'm sure you have missed calls and text messages too."

When she checked her phone, he was right. She hadn't even noticed her phone making sounds, her mom, Phineas' parents, some of her friends... so she was sure Gretchen hadn't told anyone. At first she felt bad... but it wasn't like she was kidnapped right? They knew her and Phineas were together, and were safe... well they didn't know they were safe but they should. "Your parents... I expected to notice you missing, but as long as I was quiet I didn't expect my mom to notice anything. No doubt they think I'm a bad influance on you."

"It was my idea, and yours... but you didn't know it was a real idea until like later. So don't worry about them. If they are mad, it'll blow over and they'll jus tbe worried right?" Phineas put his arm around her, leading her into the house, the chilly air hadn't completely taken over the cabin yet, but it was trying to. She moved over to the couch and sat down, as Phineas put some old wooden logs into the fireplace and tried to light them. And she laughed, with all his intellegance he couldn't do this... so she went over and helped him. At least something the Fireside Girls taught her would come in handy in a real life situation. She would be in charge of making the fires.

"There, thats better now isn't it?" Isabella smiled as she watched the flickering fire, she pulled his armalmost dragging him to the couch. It was good to throw him off his game once in a while, it kept him on his toes.

"At least one of us will make sure we don't freeze," he looked at his phone again, she knew it was getting late. They had arrived at around eight, and she didn't want to hear that the day was over... yes it would start an entirely new day full of new experiences for them both, but this was the first, this was the one that would matter the most. "We haven't put anything in the rooms yet... maybe we should sleep out here tonight."

Normally someone would think he was being lazy, if she didn't know him, she would think he was lazy, but she knew that he knew that she didn't want the night to end by going to sperate rooms, no matter how much it made sense. She thought back to the night they had slept in the same bed. It was comforting, relaxing and made her tingle. Some of the things he did while kissing her made her tingle even more, but she didn't want to take that risk just yet. The new found sense that no one could walk in on them was too strong... and they might not beable to control themselves, might not want to. So she had to make herself sad, and say, "I really want a bed Phineas, maybe another night? My backs a little sore from packing and moving all this... and sitting in that car for two hours."

Phineas agreed, obviously he had been thinking the same things, but was willing to risk it to make her happy. It was sweet of him, really most guys would have begged her to stay, then took the chance to try and seduce her. Not that it had happened before, just she knew what most of the guys had said behind her back when she attended school in person. Oh she was sure Phineas would jump at the chance, he was also a teen like her, and a boy... but she could trust him, he was Phineas, anyone that knew him would understand that.

They parted ways in the hallway, they had chosen rooms right next to each other, Isabella was tired and was very happy to find the room she had chosen had a made bed. She rummaged through her bags to find the pajama's she owned. She never really worn them, but she thought living with a boy, she shouldn't invite temptation, yet. She stripped her clothes tossing them on the floor for now, until she found wherever they went, and put on her PJs on the bed was dusty, luckily everything under the covers were cleanish and she was able to just use her own blanket. See I knew there was a reason to bring this, she thought as she pulled the blanket over herself.

She jumped, and a small squeak came from her lips as thunder sounded, and shook the cabin. Why did it have to be lightning, she asked herself. She hated lightning, rather silly really but she had always had a fear of lightning. She couldn't remember if Phineas remembered or not. If he did, he hadn't come to check on her, or he was fast asleep already and just didn't know there was a storm. The storm made her anxious, and she didn't want to stay still, each flash of light, and thundering sound had her jumping and flinching. She didn't like being scared, though this was something people should be afraid of. Lightning can kill, she thought. Even her alcove wasn't enough to calm her in a storm, then again it was right next to a window.

Finally she had enough she grabbed her blanket careful not to drag it across the dusty floor, she walked out of her room and wandered to the other rooms that were empty, looking for a place she could feel safe. She needed something like her alcove. Sadly each room turned up nothing, and she started back to her room. She stopped and looked towards the door that would lead to Phineas.

No, she thought, he's sleeping... and he might laugh at you. The next lightning stike came really close to the house and shook everything. Screw this! I'm going in there, she thought as she quickly made her way into the room closing the door behind her, hoping that it would also close the lightning out. She scanned the dark room, she wasn't able to see much but the shape of everything, including the Phineas shaped mound on the bed.  
"Phineas?" she whispered, he didn't move... alright a bit closer then. She moved next to the bed, leaning closer to him, "Phineas? Are you awake?"

Still nothing, he didn't even shift in his sleep, maybe he was more tired than she thought. Fine, she thought, I'm still staying here tonight. She moved around the bed to the side that Phineas wasn't on and crawled under the blanket, she had intended to just stay there, hoping being closer to him would help calm her, but each flash of lightning had her inching towards Phineas until she was pressed up against him.

"Phineas," she whined, then Phineas mumbled something that she didn't understand, she leaned a bit closer, "Phineas?"

"Ugh... Isabella? What's wrong..." Outside thunder sounded again making her whimper, he pulled her closer to him, stroking her back. "It's alright Isabella, it's just a storm, you're safe here." That's all it took to relax her? She wasn't complaining as she held her, her eyes started to flicker shut, and she no longer heard the thunder booming, she was too occupied with the sounds of their hearts beating, and the sound of Phineas' even rhythmic breathing, and to that sound, she fell asleep.

(Duel PoV) (Not sure how this is going to work out so bare with me)  
It had been a couple of days since their 'grand excape' as they had refered to it, mostly out of humor since it seemed the ran off as fast as they could when no one was looking. But it was a big adventure, for them anyways. Oh they had done amazing things in Phineas' back yard, but nothing compared to the freedom they felt here. Neither wanted to admit that it couldn't last forever. Even though they both knew it and thought it. Phineas had been reading many of the messages on his phone, mainly to make sure no one knew where they were.

Isabella had spoken to Gretchen, who had misdirected the search by telling them she THOUGHT she over heard them talking about going somewhere south of Danville. That should buy them more time... also the other thing on their minds was the fact that once this adventure was over... what would their parents do to them. Both were sure that no matter what, they would try to keep them apart, but Phineas and Isabella swore no matter what they'd never be apart.

"You know we are going to have to go back sooner or later," Isabella said over dinner, she didn't want to admit it, but it needed to be talked about. A plan had to be made, so they wouldn't end up apart.

"I'd rather it be later honestly." Phineas said, he had been dreading this conversation, and dreading having to go back... he remembered what Isabella had become because he didn't see what she offered, never noticed her affection and in doing so he had cheated them both out of three happy years of being together. He was afraid if she was forced to leave him she would spiral down into a deep depression... and after the over dose, he didn't know if she would make it through this time. He always imagined that she held on because he had made it to her that night, he had been there for her to cling to, even if she didn't know she wanted to at the time, "But yeah, we have to go back sooner or later. Maybe I could get a job here, and maybe... buy the place from Gretchen's parents, or at least rent it."

"Phineas... I want that... but we will have to go back. I don't want to either... I don't want to lose you again. this has been the few days of my life." That was truthful, she had enjoyed every minute of it, inculding the first morning when she awoke next to Phineas, she had laid there before he awoke and pretended they were married, and she was just waking up next to him for the first time. It had been the only time she slept in the same bed with her, here at the cabin. They still both decided that it would be safer if they stayed in their rooms at night. Though neither knew it was just as frustrating for the other person as it was for them. Urges and hormone pushed at them to do that felt natural, but logic told them that it would mean trouble.

"I haven't felt this happy since... well I don't think I've ever felt this happy before, I love you Isabella, I wish I knew of a way that they couldn't keep us apart." he had been racking his brain to figure out a way to stay with Isabella, his Izzy. The girl he had just begun to realize he loved a few months ago, yes he was only fifteen but he knew what love was... he knew that in days long since past, people married at tweleve and thirteen and stayed together for life. Because innocent love is pure. People wait to marry when they are eighteen now, and older. They forgot that while they aged they became their own person, and that resulted in having to find someone that FITS you. When you are younger, you love with all your heart, you don't see body types, or hair color, you don't see race, you only see the person... the mind behind the person, and growing together loving each other from such a age, is just that. You grow together, you learn who the other person is and each adapts to the other's ways. Isn't that what marriage is? Give and take, only when you are younger you grasp the concept so much easier, and you can adapt so much faster, and you don't have to LEARN to accept someone's faults. You love them for them despite everything because it's one of the things that makes that person, that person, Phineas thought logically, to bad others didn't see it that way.

"I love you too Phineas, I don't want to leave... we have to sometime... but can we stay as long as we can? Please?" It seemed so natural to say she loved him, even though not long ago she only thought of him as an idiot. He was at times, he would always be her idiot. But it wasn't fair, she finally got who she wanted, she loved him. Didn't anyone see that? Did they think it was just a stupid crush? She wanted to marry him, yes marry him. Damn being Fifteen, she thought. I planned this when I was eleven. I knew what I wanted even then, and now the only way that's changed as the want was stronger. There were more emotions to it, more... things she hadn't been old enough to understand before.

"I still have enough money for a few more weeks," he didn't bother to tell her how much the school's payments were, though they were a lot. He didn't tell her, not because he assumed she would try and spend it, but because he didn't want her to think that he left the school where he could have been anything he wanted because of her. He hadn't told anyone this, not even Ferb who he trusted more than most. He had left that school because of Isabella, because he could have been anything he ever wanted... except with Isabella. What if he had of gone to school, would Isabella have tried to kill herself still and died because he wasn't there to stop it? He pushed those thoughts away, "So we can stay as long as we can."

"I have money too, though not as much as you do I don't think." she didn't but she did have almost five hundred dollars, you save a lot when you don't do anything for three years. It had seemed like a lot when she had counted it before Phineas and her had planned this excape, but once she realized what stuff would cost, and with no money coming in, she realized that it wouldn't last long. What were they thinking when they decided to run away? She didn't regret it at all, if nothing else this would become a fond memory of many they planned to have, honestly it was their first real date. Once they had made up that Christmas day, she hadn't been... well comfortable with going out anymore. Most of what they did consisted of being at one or the other's houses. "So we can stay a bit longer..."

Isabella's phone rang, while she had been receiving texts mostly from her mom and others, it hadn't rung in a few days, Isabella picked it up looking at the number. It was her mother... she started to put it down... then decided she was going to answer it. Tell her mother she wasn't going to take it anymore, she loved Phineas and nothing would keep her from him.

"Hello mom." Isabella answered she didn't sound mad, or even annoyed even though Phineas could tell she was both, they were having a special moment. And the very person that called was one of the ones that wanted to take it away from her.

"Mija? Mija! Where are you? I've been worried... Phineas, he is with you too?" her mother sounded concerned to her, Phineas didn't make any gestures or inquire what was being said, but he could tell that Isabella was trying hard not to yell.

"I'm fine. Yes I'm with Phineas... we are... somewhere safe" Isabella instantly wished she had ignored the call.

"You need to come home Mija... I know you didn't like being grounded... but Mija it was just for your..." her mother had started, and Isabella no longer looked like she had any control.

"It was not for my own good, Phineas is smart, I am smart... We KNOW what would have happened if we did... THAT. We are not coming home until we are allowed to be together. Period." Her voice was soft and almost quiet, though Phineas could see the anger bubbling up in her, or was it sadness? He wasn't sure if she was angry because of what her mother had obviously said from context, or if she was sad because he mother didn't trust her enough to make the right choices. When the tears started welling up in her eyes, then spilt over her cheeks he knew. Her went over to hold her, whatever comfort he could give her was all he could give to her at the moment.

She doesn't trust me, she thought. She had always done the right thing when it came to THAT stuff. She had had plenty of offers for that, but even in her dark years, she knew deep down, even if she never admited it, that Phineas was the only one for her. Thats why she had never dated anyone, well that and she didn't want to be ignored by someone she liked again. Her mother knew she wouldn't do something stupid like that... didn't she? Well that would definitely keep them together, if they did that... and she became... no that wouldn't work that would just give more reason to keep her and Phineas apart, and it would prove that she couldn't be trusted. Oh she wouldn't mind having Phineas' baby... but not for a couple more years at least. She didn't know what to do, she had bluffed saying they wouldn't come back until they were allowed to be together, but she knew they only had maybe two months, more or less.

He always hated to hear her cry, it made his chest tight and he wanted to yell at whoever had hurt her... however this time the person who did, could only make matters worse. So instead of picking up the phone and calling Isabella's mother he rubbed her back softly and held her as she cried. "So we are staying here until they decide we can be together?"

Isabella nodded, and realized that she had made a choice for them both without talking to him first. Was he angry at her for that? "Y-Yeah..." she sniffled, "I-I didn't know what else to s-say."

"It's alright, sounds like a good plan. They know we are safe, so they won't have to worry too much. And we get to do as we planned, stay as long as we can." He kissed her deeply, it was odd how satisfied her felt kissing her when tears ran down her face, it wasn't that it enjoyed her crying, as much as he enjoyed feeling her face slowly dry as they kissed. Almost like him kissing her was pushing the bad emotions away.


	7. Chapter 7

( Still Joint PoV)

Days went by, and each were enjoyed even more than the one that came before it. The elderly couple that ran the General Store were always as friendly as could be, his name was Robert, and her name was Alice. Isabella and Phineas had spent hours there talking with them, hearing stories about when the elderly couple were their ages, or the ages they assumed they were since they didn't tell them they were only fifteen. Given both teens were mature enough in their own rights, people just assumed they were a newly married couple, and they just never bothered to correct them. Everyone that came and went were friendly, and more than happy to meet new comers to their town. Well they assumed Phineas and Isabella had moved there.

"So Phineas, whatcha do for a living?" Robert asked, while Alice was showing Isabella how to cook something, obviously the General Store doubled as the elderly couples home.

"Well..." Phineas didn't want to lie to the man, he had been so kind to him and Isabella that he couldn't out and out lie, when all he had really done was stretch the truth. "Honestly, I don't have a job. We've been using the money that I had... saved up. Won't be long before we have to go."

"Go? Where is it you'll be going?" the man seemed concerned, but Phineas wasn't really sure what to tell him, and again he didn't want to lie so he just said nothing. "I'm just concerned you see, don't like to see a young couple fall on hard times, 'specially such a nice couple."

"Well, back to our parents houses for now I guess, we lived across the street from each other so we'll be close. If they'd even let us be together anymore." He hadn't meant to say that, if the man asked he'd have no choice but to tell the truth, and he was sure he was going to have to.

"Whatcha mean 'let you'?" Yeah Phineas knew from the moment those words came out of his mouth that he'd have to either lie or explain. A normal person would lie to cover their tracks, but Phineas couldn't, wouldn't repay the man's kindness with deceit.

"See, uh Isabella and I are... well we are only fifteen. Our parents got mad about... something that didn't happen and made us stay away from each other... See our friend, her family has a cabin they hardly use..." Phineas explained the entire situation to the man, then waited for his response... and it wasn't what he expected.

"So you two ran away from home, and came here to be together right? So you've been here for if I recall the first time I saw you two, was almost two weeks ago." the man didn't sound upset, or even amazed, didn't even seem to phased by it.

"Aren't you going to ask if we are too young to be doing this?"

"Not really, no me and the missus got married about your age, so we understand where you're coming from. So I don't think that you're too young." about this time Isabella and and Alice returned from the kitchen, Isabella seemed joyful obviously she had enjoyed learning what she had been taught. "And uh well I might could use some help 'round here from time to time, if you're willing to help that is."

Phineas hadn't expected the man to offer them a way to stay longer, honestly he hadn't expected any of what the man said. Normally adults told them what they should and shouldn't do. He expected Robert to tell him, that he and Isabella should return home. "Yeah, yeah I would like that... really thank you... you don't know how much it means to me."

"Of course I do, remember we were your age once, thought it might seem like a long time ago to you. But we were, and we do understand." he smiled, and invited them to come over for dinner sometime. Phineas of course said they'd be happy too, and on their way out, Robert called him, "Just whenever you're ready to start, come on by and we'll figure out something."

Once back in the car, and heading back to the cabin. Isabella had started asking questions about everything Robert had said. He told her about what was said, about the offer to help and earn money so they could stay longer. Isabella was ecstatic, bummed a bit when she found out that he had told Robert their real ages, but that didn't really matter. They could stay... that would teach their parents to try to keep them apart.

Phineas turned down the road that would lead to the cabin, things were at a all time high. Everything seemed to be working out for them, they'd get to be together, and who knows they might even end up staying in this area. Phineas was going to be working... maybe she could find something to do to help. She knew that they couldn't stay in the cabin forever, Gretchen's parents were bound to return or sell the place. But maybe they could buy it from them if they saved enough, or find another place.

Phineas' thoughts were in the same area, he was happy that they might be able to at least hold their end of Isabella's bluff, and still that left them more time to themselves. He didn't think anything could ruin this moment, could ruin the feelings and happiness he felt. Until he pulled into the private road that lead to the house. His parents car was in front of the house and so were his parents, and Isabella's mother... Isabella's hand tightened on his wrist as they came to a stop.

"Phineas?" Isabella whispered and wouldn't quite return her mothers gaze. What now, she wondered as she sat there. She knew she was supposed to get out of the car, but she didn't want to... it wasn't supposed to end like this. Everything was starting to look up.

"It's okay Isabella," he just wished his voice showed confidence in that statement. And he wondered at the moment just how they had found them... had Gretchen said anything... maybe her parents paid more attention to the bill than she assumed... or maybe one of the friendly towns people had told them someone was in their cabin. He wasn't sure, but he was sure that he'd find out as soon as he was brave enough to get out of the car.

Before either of them muster up the courage to leave, it had been decided for them as each mother came over and opened the door for their child. Each mother said nothing, as they took them by the hands and lead them into the cabin that for the past almost month they lived in peace, and near solitude. Phineas and Isabella doubted that what would happen next inside that cabin, now not be peaceful or happy. Each knew the risk when they decided to run away like this. Didn't think it would catch up with them so fast, though. Once inside, Isabella figured she had to say something.

"W-we... ah... we didn't know what... uh... else to do. We wanted to be together, and you said no... nothing happened that night... nothing happened here. We slept in different rooms," she started, no one interrupted her so she continued... hoping whatever she said would lessen whatever punishment was to come. "We love each other, you might not think that... that we are old enough to know... but we do! And... and you should trust us enough to make the right choices!"

"Trust you? Mija, you two ran away, refused to come back... if it wasn't for Gretchen's mom over hearing Gretchen talking to Milly we would have never known where you were. We've been worried. Mija how can we trust you, when you can't even... do as you're told." Isabella's mother said.

"And Phineas, we expected better out of you. Running away? What in the world possessed you to do something so foolish, and dangerous." Now was not the time to talk about some of the dangerous things they had done... so Phineas just ignored that part.

"I... uh... this was my idea. Isabella didn't know I was serious until the end... this was all my idea... I just couldn't..." he stopped and just looked to the floor. He hadn't known that to say, but he did want them to know it wasn't Isabella's plan. If anyone was to be punished it was to be him.

(Isabella's Pov)

She couldn't believe what Phineas had just said, he was taking all the blame for it... sure he had planned it, but she went along with it without opposing it. She never told him it wasn't a good idea... because well she thought it was a great idea. Living with no rules...

"Well maybe we were right about keeping you apart, we wanted you two to end up together, but not if this is whats going to happen," one of the parents said.

No rules, being able to do as you please... wait what did they say? They were going to try to keep them apart again? No... I refuse. "You can't do this!"

"We are your parent's Mija, we can and we will. Maybe you two can date when you both are mature enough." her mother said, and went to take her arm to lead her to the care.

No... not again. She didn't have the will to fight, she was just lead to the car. Mr. Fletcher road with Phineas in his car, leaving her with hers and Phineas' mother, which she would have thought completely unfair if she had been able to think about more than having to be away from Phineas again. What was she going to do without Phineas? She had become accustom to having him around, even more so these last few weeks. She couldn't be without him... no she needed a way to keep him around. The entire ride her mother only continued to tell her how irresponsible she was, until Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher said she was being way to harsh... that while it wasn't the smartest choice, that at least she and Phineas were safe. Needless to say it was a very long car trip.

Isabella wondered what the conversation was like behind them, Phineas' step father seemed to have always been alright with the things Phineas had done... maybe he wasn't being berated like she was. She hoped not anyways even if she had to she didn't want Phineas to be yelled at because she loved him and didn't want him to think he was wrong, that she was wrong. They weren't.


	8. Chapter 8

(Isabella's PoV)

It was almost June, a couple weeks after her and Phineas had been found at Gretchen's parents cabin. Her and Phineas would text when they could, but since their parents didn't trust them much it was never long before they were interrupted. She was back in her alcove which still made her feel safe... but not like she had felt during that storm with Phineas. No this was pale in comparison to that. It was amazing how something so small could change something that was always the same... this place had meant safety to her... and now it was just a place to sit. But it was also the only place she could see Phineas... and that was only through the window, and if he was at his window.

They still sent text messages to one another, but it wasn't the same... no more plans of running away. It seemed just robotic, neither of them wanted to be reminded of what they couldn't have. Though at the same time they didn't want to give up the only part of what they wanted. So they would talk and stare at each other through their windows. They seemed to be modern day Romeo and Juliet. Well minus the double suicide, and the feuding families. Every day that went by she could feel it in his text messages that even he had started to give up hope. The plan she had been working on again for her own wedding had stopped. The note book, the books she had given Phineas, and had gotten back just for the planning parts sat in the top of her closet. Hadn't been touched in weeks.

She was once again falling into a depression that she just couldn't seem to break. Isabella had tried everything she could think of to get her mind off of Phineas. At first it was simple enough to find some task such as cleaning her room, or typing in her diary, and things seemed to be alright, but again with each text message she send and received more and more of her died inside. Just when she seemed to have been able to start putting the pieces of her life back together, they all seemed to be smashed again. This time not even by her own doing, her mothers of all people. The one person that was supposed to do what she could to help her.

Her mother, now that was a different topic. One that she didn't care to even think about. Her mother had not only stopped her from seeing Phineas... but grounded her. Not even her friends could come over to see her, she felt like she had only a year before, hopeless, alone, and depressed. Only this time she didn't even have Gretchen to talk to. She could text Gretchen or call her, but even that wasn't the same. She missed the contact that she had neglected for so long. She assumed she would be able to step right back into her life of solitude, and be as happy as she was... or could have been anyways. Sadly she couldn't not anymore, she had gotten used to having people around again.

It had gotten dark and she could no longer see if Phineas was in his room. She pushed herself up, and crawled out of her alcove. She sat down in front of her computer. Texting wasn't the only options available. She signed into one of her messengers, and looked for Phineas' name. Wasn't hard, only him Gretchen and a few others were there. She opened the chat window and sent her message.

'Phineas, are you in your room?' she waited for a response, he wasn't always in his room. He was lucky his parents were not like her mother. It seems they seemed to understand why they did what they did. Even if they hadn't at first. Why couldn't her mother be more like that? She waited for about fifteen minutes before she pulled out her phone. 'Phineas, I sent you a IM. When you have the time message me back, kay?'

'Alright. Message you in a second, just finishing diner.' Oh yeah it is about diner time, she thought. Normally her mother would have come to get her. Maybe she was just tired of seeing her, or maybe just tired of being asked when she'd be able to see Phineas again.

She and her mother hadn't spoken much since was brought back from Gretchen's cabin. Isabella didn't have much she wanted to say to her mother, that wouldn't result in being grounded longer that is, and her mother she figured didn't have anything she wanted to say to her. Wasn't her mother supposed to be happy she was alright? That she didn't do anything stupid with Phineas... when she could have. She had wanted to, but at the same time she knew the risks... and if something had happened, she would NEVER see Phineas again, or maybe not. She didn't know and she wasn't about to test those boundaries.

'Hey Izzy, how are you today?' Phineas had typed into the window.

'-shrugs- Tired of being on house arrest. I want to be with you... I'm not sure how much more of this I can take. I'm so sad Phineas.' It was true, she hadn't told Phineas yet how depressed she was becoming. He'd only worry about her more, he had asked a couple of times before but she would tell him that she was alright, sad but alright.

'Mom said she was going to try to talk to your mom about it. Maybe it'll help?' Phineas' family was always so nice, she wished that she had that family instead. But wishing never helped anything.

'Maybe it will. Phineas I love you. But I don't want to... I don't know.' She sent that, trying to figure out how to send the next part. She loved Phineas with everything inside her, but she could feel Phineas getting more sad with each passing day, just like she felt more and more of herself die. She didn't want Phineas to end up like she did, 'So maybe if you want to... I don't know. Maybe you might not want to be my boyfriend anymore since you can't really see me.'

'I love you too Isabella. I want to be your boyfriend. Who's being a idiot now?' She laughed at the irony she had been the one to call him an idiot for not noticing how she felt for a long time. Maybe she was just being an idiot. It would all blow over and she'd be able to be with Phineas again.

'Okay okay so I'm an idiot.'

'Izzy things will get better, I promise. Just wait and see when mom talked to your mom, they'll work things out.' Isabella smiled, and they talked a bit more, about each others day, mainly his because hers consisted mainly of sitting in her alcove looking for him to appear in his window. And that night she fell asleep happier than she had been in weeks.

The next morning she was woken up by yelling downstairs. Not even bothering to change out of her sleeping cloths, that consisted of nothing more than a long black t-shirt and her underwear that couldn't be seen anyways. And slowly went down stairs. First she saw her mother gesturing to someone, as she descended more she was able to see Mrs Flynn-Fletcher.

"Vivian, I know you're still angry... but they were only..." Linda had started, then was interrupted.

"Only? Only? She just went and ran off with Phineas... You should be angry too. No doubt this was all Isabella's idea. Phineas was always a good boy... I don't know what happened to Isabella but it doesn't matter anymore. I've decided that we are leaving Danville."

"Vivian, leaving Danville isn't the answer. If anything it'll only make matters worse..." Isabella didn't hear the rest of what Phineas' mom said, she had started back to her room.

"Leaving Danville? No..." Just when she thought nothing else could make her more depressed than she already was, more than she had been for those three years. This was so much worse, she wouldn't even be able to see Phineas through her window. What could she do now? Running away didn't work, if anything it only made matters worse. And her mother believed it was solely her idea. She didn't want to throw the blame at Phineas, even if it had been his idea, but it was unfair for her to take the blame for it... then again that's all her mother thought of her now anyways. Fine if she wanted to leave Danville let her. Isabella tore through her closet looking for certain items.

When she finished she looked over what she had collected, sleeping bag, a lot of the camping equipment she used when she was in the Fireside Girls, her flint, flashlights. Along with several other items that had been made by Phineas when she was younger. She was short a few things, but she knew they were in the garage. Seems this is the second time being a Fireside Girl has paid off. If her mother wanted to leave Danville, she could... without her. Sadly if she took Phineas with her, it would only cause more issues. She couldn't even tell her friends, so no one could over hear them talking, again. If she had to be alone, she'd be alone on her own terms.

Isabella put everything in a large duffel bag, and waited for her mother to leave the house. Of course that wouldn't have taken long, she was always going out to do something. It didn't matter as soon as she saw the car pull away she drug the bag downstairs, and out into the garage. Where she found the other camping supplies, and managed, even if it wasn't gracefully, to attach everything to her bike then left. She left no note, no indication she was going to return. Nothing.

(Phineas' PoV)

His mother had come home and told him about what Isabella's mother had said about them leaving Danville. It seemed entirely unfair to both him and Isabella. He again told his mother that it wasn't even Isabella's idea that it had been his idea. Convincing his mother wasn't the problem, she knew. She had believed him the first time he told them at the cabin, but Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro didn't seem to want to believe. She always seemed to think Isabella was the source of the problems. Phineas had thought that maybe she would have lightened up some after Isabella had tried committing suicide, and she had for a while. It didn't talk long before she started seeing Isabella as nothing more than a troublesome youth again.

Phineas was helping his father repair an antique clock when he and his father heard Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro out in the living room. Phineas wondered why she was here... Maybe she had reconsidered moving... maybe he was allowed to see Isabella again.

"Are you sure he's here?" Isabella's mother asked, just as he came into the room behind her.

"Yes, he's standing right behind you." his mother said, and Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro turned to look at him, she looked frustrated, and worried.

"Have you seen Isabella?" She asked him. What a stupid question, even if he had he wouldn't say he did. She had forbade them from seeing each other.

"You told me I wasn't allowed to see Isabella." His voice was flat, showing how he felt about the obviously stupid question. He didn't know when he started thinking feeling this way towards Isabella's mother. He had always been compliant and willing to do most anything to please an adult.

"Phineas!" his mother said, sounding as shocked as he had been to hear the words come form his mouth. "Phineas, Isabella has run off again, Vivian came over to see if you two had run off again."

"No this time I didn't make the plans to run off." He started putting on his shoes, and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" His mother asked.

"Well, instead of being counter-productive," he looked directly at Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro, then before he left he said. "I'm going to try to find her."


	9. Chapter 9

(Phineas' PoV)

Someone had mentioned someone looking like Isabella in a general store near this forest, that she always came in to fill a couple of containers of water every so often. There was a lot of campers in the area this time of the year, so it made sense she would choose this spot. If anyone saw her, they'd just assume she was another camper on her way to her campsite. While Isabella looked like more of a city girl, her time in the Fireside Girls had provided her with everything she needed to survive in the wilderness for this long.

Phineas took off a back pack setting it on the ground, and then sat on a fallen tree in the middle of the woods. Isabella had been gone a little over four months now, everyone else had quit looking after a month had passed, except him and the Fireside Girls. Even Isabella's mother had assumed the worst. Phineas refused to believe that anything bad happened to Isabella, that she was fine until proven otherwise, that was logic. Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro had obviously reconsidered leaving Danville, which infuriated Phineas to no end, that was the reason Isabella left, since he wasn't there and didn't really know, he assumed it was anyways. But she reconsidered in hopes that Isabella would return, and had promised she wouldn't make her leave. He pulled a bottle of water from the pack, and drank from it looking around. He'd been looking in these woods for about a week now, only returning to the camper at night to sleep. He had thought he found her trail a couple of times, but it was so hard to tell with the amount of visitors in these woods. If he had only gotten the information sooner before summer had really started... he couldn't dwell on that.

It was only noon, and it had already been a long day for him, he had started looking for her as soon as the sun had risen, he marked each path he went on, so he wouldn't spend hours in the same area, however he did come across his own markings several times, he wasn't made for nature. He was completely out of his element here, but somewhere in these woods waited the person he longed to see more than anyone else. Isabella just had to be here.

Several times he thought he had found her, came across several campsites that had a raven haired girl. Luckily the people understood the confusion, though sadly when he showed them her picture, no one had seen her. He still had a lot of ground to cover today, he put the bottle of water back into his pack before shouldering it again, and dredged on. All the while he wondered exactly the kind of person that would willingly do this for fun. Weird people... but to each their own, he thought.

He had been rather thick in noticing Isabella's feelings towards him, but now he kind of understood how she had felt. Like now for instance, he wanted to just be close to her to see her, to touch her... but she was no where to be found. He just had to find her, and he knew that she was alright, people had saw her, and not too long ago. He had tried waiting for her to return to the general store to get more water, the man had told her that she returned every couple of weeks or so, but after the second day he was too anxious to wait any longer. Gretchen and Katie who had come with him, would wait at the store with Candace who drove them there in a camper, in case she returned before he did. The more he thought about it, the more likely she'd return before he did, because he believed he just might be lost. No matter, all he'd have to do it find another campsite and someone would be able to direct him back to the store.

He pushed the thought out of his mind that he'd seen too many horror movies that started with teens lost in the woods, though it was hard to not think about. But he continued, because he needed to find Isabella. He wasn't sure she'd come with him, because even he didn't know what kind of trouble she'd be in when she returned. He just hoped that Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro wouldn't be angry at all at Isabella, though he knew that was a futile effort. He sighed as he sat down leaning against a tree, he wasn't out of shape or anything but his body was not used to all this hiking through the woods thing. He quietly ate what he had brought for lunch, which he hadn't eaten when he stooped earlier. The sun was getting low in the sky, it would be dark in a couple of hours. He was sure he couldn't make it back tot he store before nightfall. It was a clear night, so he was lucky. It could have been a stormy day and he was going to have to sleep out here. He pushed himself away from the tree, and decided to at least try to find another campsite, at least he'd have a place to start a fire... if he could manage it.

The sun had started to set by the time he found another campsite. This one already had someone staying in it, but maybe they'd be willing to let him joined them, not in their tent or anything, but just for the fire's warmth, and it's safety. He called out to anyone there, and he got no answer... Okay he had definitely seen more than one horror movie like this, a lost teen in the woods, coming across an abandoned, or seemingly abandoned camp site. The more he looked around, the more he noticed that this campsite was much different from the previous one's he'd been to. For one, it was near a river. The fire pit was different from all the others, it was wider and deeper. Most importantly it lacked a trash can, and there wasn't litter from cans and packages like some of the others had.

He set his pack down, and walked through the campsite, nothing really out of place. It seemed everything had been used recently, and no dead bodies in the tent... always a good sign. Before turning out of the tent, something caught his eye, a solar powered lantern. Not that those were uncommon, but this one was... he had made this one for Isabella... he looked around, some of the clothing, while faded did look familiar. He went out of the tent, looking around as if just knowing she was here would make her visible to him. He moved closer to the river, something moved in the water. He moved closer, he passed a pile of clothing left on a rock... that should have been a dead give away about what he was about to intrude upon, but he wasn't thinking about that...

Either, he was hidden enough in the brush by the river, or she had gotten so used to no one being around that she didn't even bother looking up on shore. But there was Isabella, coming out of the water... with nothing on... the image in his mind of the girl across the street had been forever altered. He saw her as beautiful, always as beautiful. But this... how she looked this way... his mind couldn't even process words that reflected how she looked. Oh he'd fantasized about how she'd look naked, he was after all a teenage boy. She looked a little thinner than he imagined, but that could be due to living out here for so long. She looked so relaxed, so at home he almost felt ashamed just being here... though he should have been ashamed of staring at her naked. A few more steps, he liked the way parts of her body would move when she stepped, and she glanced up. Her eyes locked with his... he watched as it clicked in her mind who he was... then watched it click when she realized she was naked... and he wished he saw it click when she screamed, and threw a rock at him hitting him in the head.

(Joint PoV)

When his eyes opened, she had gotten dressed, drug him back to the campsite, though he wasn't sure if she had gotten dressed before or after... he shouldn't even be thinking about that. He sat up and she just looked at him, he wasn't sure what to say. He had thought about it time and time again, and there were several things that he had wanted to say, none of them came to mind at the moment though.

"Sorry about hitting you in the head with a rock..." her voice was rough, but oh it was beautiful. It was like a part of him that had died had been resurrected. And he didn't care about the rock. "But you shouldn't sneak up on someone when they are taking a bath."

"I didn't know you were taking a bath..." he smiled, he wanted to move closer. But he wasn't sure if it would be accepted by her, she had been alone for four months and he wanted to make sure she didn't have anymore rocks before he made any sudden movements. "Can I... um can I come closer?"

"Uh..." she seemed to think for a moment, then she smiled and nodded. "Of course."

"You don't have any more rocks, or like a stick do you?" He asked, only semi-joking, he closed the distance before she replied, and put his arms around her. She sighed happily and buried her face in his neck.

"How'd you find me anyways?" she asked her voice slightly muffled by his neck.

"Well I never stopped looking, and the guy at the store here said he saw you come in there often enough for water. So I started looking, been out here for a couple of days... hating every minute of it by the way." He kissed her cheek, then her lips it wasn't a big passionate kiss. He just wanted to be sure this was real. "Then well I found you by accident really. I got lost, it started getting dark and I stumbled across your camping area, found the lantern I made for you... then found you..." his eyes glazed over for a moment as he recalled her body, until her fingers snapped in front of his face.

"Hey hey, stop thinking about that..." her eyes narrowed, and she looked at him. At least living out here alone hadn't ruined her shyness, even if she was comfortable swimming in a river naked... and his mind started going back... "What did I just tell you!"

"Sorry... kinda hard to forget..." he smiled and shrugged, she sighed and huffed. Nothing could have made him happier, she pretended to fight him as he pulled her into another hug, but quickly gave up her fake attempt and embraced him back.

"So... uh... whats the plan now?" she asked as her cheek laid on his shoulder.

"Dunno, was hoping you'd come back with me. I mean I did come all the way out here and fight the wilderness to find you. I can't leave without something." Phineas said, thinking that maybe not leaving wouldn't be such a bad thing... then his brain started working fully, when he realized he'd die out her if he stayed... or jump off a rock. He was not suited for this.

"Well you'd get to leave with a rather exotic memory of me." Funny how what she told him not to think about, she was now using as a distraction. Very good distraction, it almost worked. Almost.

"Well I was planning on leaving with more than just a exotic memory." she looked shocked at what he said, then realized how it could have been taken out of context. "No no, I meant leaving with you... YOU."

"I can't go back Phineas... if I do, she would just make me move, and I don't want to leave." Phineas felt the warm tears on his neck.

"Izzy, you did leave. Left me, and Danville and everyone. And your mom reconsidered leaving, she realized that in two years she couldn't stop you anyways." he pulled his pack closer and fished out a small packaged cake, and a wrapped gift. "You were gone for your birthday... so... I decided to bring this with me just in case I found you. Sorry I don't have a candle."

She just sat there tears in her eyes, she had assumed that everyone had written her off, that no one would have continued looking for her after she was gone for so long. To think, he brought this with him, because he had his heart set on finding her, and wouldn't have left without finding her. Even if it took the rest of his life. She opened the brightly wrapped gift, it was a leather bound book. She looked at him at first confused.

"It's only part of your gift, you have to come home with me for the rest of it, if you want it." He smiled and watched her open the book. Watched the tears form in her eyes as she read what was inside... in his free time when he wasn't looking for her, or when he was resting. He had been planning his and her wedding just as they had talked about. "I'm not very good at this stuff, so... I figured that you could help me out on some of it... as long as it's not held out here... I don't want to get lost at my own wedding..."

Isabella snickered at the comment, while he had found it hard to navigate through the woods, she wasn't really more than about a 30-45 minute walk from the general store, and he'd been out here for a few days? Yeah he was hopeless in the woods. "I didn't think we'd ever get to plan it... honestly I didn't think anyone would ever find me... well really look for me."

"You didn't think I'd look for you?" That kind of hurt a little that she didn't believe he'd look for her, hadn't he proven that he loved her with everything he was. He stumbled around like a fool in the forest, so far out of his comfort-zone to find her. He'd continued to look for her for four months. Even brought her a book he planned their wedding in.

"Well... You... I knew you'd keep looking. You are stubborn... Phineas I love you." She leaned against him summer had been over for a month, and the night air had started to bite, it wasn't unusual for this area to get cooler at night, not freezing just cooler.

"I love you too Isabella. So will you come home with me?" she didn't really want to go back home, she was free here. She was able to let go of a lot of her anger and frustration here by just being here. But home... where Phineas would be across the street. Where her friends would be. She even missed her mom, in a weird way.

"Alright, in the morning we'll pack up and leave... if" she started.

"If?"

"If you can convince our parents to let me stay with you." she said firmly. Phineas had no doubt that his parents wouldn't put up too much of a fight about it. But her mother with be the problem.

"I'll try... but..." He wasn't sure what he should be asking, she had been alone out here for months. Now wanted to stay with him not that he was unhappy about it. Then again, even having been out here for so long Isabella was after all, Isabella.

"But what?" she looked at him, couldn't figure out what he was thinking, then again figuring out his mind was not always her strongest suit. But if he couldn't agree with it, she couldn't go with him.

"I'm not sure what your mom would say about that... that is kinda how all this started Izzy... that and the cabin..." he felt her slump against him as he said this, he knew that she knew he was right, but he didn't want to be.

"Who came with you?" she asked, maybe if her mother wasn't there, she could find out if they would accept the terms, and if they couldn't... she could disappear back into the woods.

"Katie, Candace, and Gretchen... Candace drove."

"Okay, you can call my mom in the morning, and your parents... if they don't agree I stay. If they do then I'll go." It seemed fair enough, though he didn't tell her, that if she stayed, he would too even if he didn't like it. Isabella doused the flames and they both went into the tent, it wasn't really designed around two people, it was mainly just for her. But they managed to get comfortable laying on the sleeping bag. Something that had happened only twice before, she curled up with him just happy to finally have someone here. It had been so very lonely out here alone... peaceful yes, but lonely all the same.

He wrapped his arms around her, he expected some big thing upon finding her a tearful reunion. Instead he got a much better view of her than he could have ever managed to sneak on his own... a rock to the head, the memory again... he was finding it difficult to not think about that memory. Yes yes, he thought, got her to agree to return home with me... with conditions... and his mind faded, he was tired from his long day... he didn't even have a chance to worry about what Gretchen, Katie, and Candace would think when he didn't return.

The next morning, they decided to wait on breakfast... since Phineas didn't feel like berries fruit, and fish. Smiling to herself she decided that Phineas would starve in the wilderness if he had to forage for food. It's funny to see a genius thrown off stride when faced with finding food that didn't come from a package from the store. Lucky for him, she didn't love him for his wilderness training, she didn't even love him for his mind... it was something about how he cared about her... Even when he didn't realize that she loved him, he still cared. She loved him simply because he was himself. Once everything was packed up, her and Phineas carried everything while she lead.

"You've got to be kidding me." Phineas said as they walked out of the woods, coming face to face with the camper that he had arrived in, "You were... I wandered for hours... and you were..."

Ahh yes, she laughed she had been wondering what kind of reaction she would get when he found out. No doubt the other fireside girls would have found her more quickly, but she assumed he had been stubborn, as per usual and wanted to find her on his own. Then there was screaming coming from the camper, not the kind that usually meant danger, more like excitement.

A door slammed open and Katie, and Gretchen... barely clothed... more than he had found Isabella in anyways, came running out from around the side of the camper. They completely ignored him running to Isabella. Well then, he thought as he continued carrying his items dropping them next to the camper.

"So you found her." Candace strode around the side, at least she had taken the time to wear more than panties and a shirt. She smiled, coming over putting her hand on his shoulder. "We had hoped when you didn't come back last night that you had found her."

"Barely... I got lost and ran across her camp on accident. I might have passed it by if I didn't notice something I made for Isabella. But she wasn't at the camp she was... uh... in the river... anyways by the time I came to..." Candace interrupted.

"Came to?"

"Uh well you see... she was... bathing in the river... and she hit me in the head with a rock. Anyways... it was too dark by then to you know come back so we waited until morning." Candace had been laughing since the moment he said bathing, didn't make him feel happy but oh well. "I need to borrow your phone... Isabella might not come back with us."

"Why not?" Candace had stopped laughing, looking over to where the others were, nothing understandable even coming from that area... at least nothing he understood.

"See she wants to stay with... us, and if her mother doesn't agree she said she's not going back." Phineas hung his head, he was sure she knew how hard it was for him to have found her, and still he might end up losing her again... It had been sheer luck he had found her. If she knew he was looking in the right area, she might never be found again.

"I'll handle it Phineas, go inside and get something to eat... I... I'll make sure everything will be alright." She started dialing, and he had started around the camper before he stopped.

"If she doesn't go with us... I'm," he sighed not even looking back he just looked toward the store. "I'm staying too."

He went into the general store, he hadn't noticed before that it had a kitchen, then again he had only been there long enough to show the man a picture, and was out the door. He sat down at a table where he could see Isabella and her friends get back into the camper. He wanted Isabella all to himself, but that was selfish... they had missed her too. He looked at the menu and shrugged, he didn't care what he ate as long as it wasn't fish, he might have to be eating more of that than he wanted to soon enough. So he decided on toast, eggs, and bacon. Seemed simple enough... the anticipation he felt, he wanted to make sure whatever he ate agreed with him, his stomach was doing flips, and would continue doing them until Candace was off the phone, and he had an answer.

He had finished his breakfast and the waitress had cleared his table... he continued sitting there. Candace still hadn't come to tell him... he didn't even know if she was still on the phone. What would he do if they refused... obviously he'd stay here with Isabella. He couldn't see himself living anywhere else.

"Seems you have a lot on your mind Sugar." the waitress was back, she was an older lady maybe a bit older than his mother, she reminded him of Alice from the general store, where they ran off to the cabin. Though she looked different than Alice, and was younger. He just felt safer around her, like he had with Alice.

"Yeah... I came here looking for a girl in the woods..." he started, the waitress, who asked to be called Teresa, had said she remembered him coming in and going right back out, she was happy when he told her that he had found her... after four months of searching. And now it came down to one phone call, to see if it was all in vein or not.

"Well, let me tell ya, she's a lucky girl." Teresa said, and put her hand on his shoulder. "Not many guys care enough to look 'round the house for what they want anymore... for you to spend months looking for her... and going through these woods for her. She's lucky, things'll work out, just you wait and see."

He paid for his breakfast, and wandered around the store looking at all the things he had over looked when he first came in. It was like a small mall, this place had things you'd never think to see in a single store, the main thing that caught his attention was the jewelry. He was told by Teresa on one of her trips past him on her way to do this or that, that all of the stones in the jewelry came from this area. That was pretty unique, he thought. He caught Teresa by the arm the next time she went by, asking her if she got a minute if she could show him some of it.

When she returned again, he wasn't too interested in all of the pieces, he was only interested in two pieces, and only because the stones were the same color blue as Isabella's eyes. A simple necklace chain that held a blue stone... but more importantly a ring holding the same stone. If nothing else he'd leave with that ring he had to. When he asked how much they were, he sighed... he didn't bring all that much with him, didn't think he'd need it Well I said if I had to leave with one it would be the ring.

"I'll take the ring," he said, looking at it then looking at the necklace.

"Your going to get her one of these rings, instead of one of those fancy ones from one of those big stores?" She looked mildly shocked, obviously not to many tourists cared enough about the jewelry.

"Yeah, it's not so much the ring is it? It's more of the feelings behind the words, what it represents, right?" He didn't know much about all this stuff, even if he had been planning his and Isabella's wedding. But he did understand that concept, and he knew that Isabella would like anything he got for her.

"That's right that's what it's about. How about I sell you the ring and necklace for the same price... not often someone proposes to someone with one of our rings." Teresa smiled and putting each in their own box, and handing them to him. When he started to protest that someone would be angry if a necklace was missing, she just smiled. "Think my husband would fire me, shoot no. He couldn't run this place without me."

That solved that as far as she was concerned, Phineas thought. As he started to walk out the store, almost forgetting to pay he ran back in and muttered his apologies to Teresa and her husband. Who both smiled, but she said, it wasn't every day someone proposed... so it was understandable, and at least he did remember.

He looked over his shoulder, at the two watching from the window. Candace was coming over... he didn't really pay attention if she was happy or not, so he didn't know what kind of news she brought, he interrupted her before she started talking... saying simply he had to do this now, no matter what their parents said. He pulled the ring box out of the bag and put it in his pocket... he had a plan... it was simple and he had just thought of it while he walked out, but it was a plan... he just hoped he'd remember it all.

"I-Isabella?" he called into the camper, and seconds later she appeared before him.

"So what did they say?" she looked weary, but he shook his head.

"I dunno yet, I wanted to give you this first." he opened the box with the necklace, now Gretchen and Katie appeared beside her thankfully fully clothed. They all gasped at the necklace, said how pretty it was, and how it matched her eyes. She turned around letting Phineas put it on her, then let the girls admire it some before she turned around again...

At first she didn't see him, then she looked down he was kneeling on the ground. At first she wondered if he was going to be sick or something, being out in the woods for so many days non-stop could make someone sick... Until he looked up at her and opened the ring box. Everything stopped for Isabella, even Gretchen and Katie were now speechless.

"Isabella...I um..." he had a plan... he had done everything in it... but now his mouth wouldn't work. He fought trying to string the words together kneeling there in front of her. "Will you... marry me?"

It was so cute, nothing like she had imagined his proposal to be. She had imagined all his family and her's around when he did it, she imagined music in the background... but this was better. It was unscripted, surrounded by nature... the ring... she had looked at it a couple times when she had come here for water... had the lady inside said something? Or had he picked it all on his own?

"Isabella?" Candace whispered moving next to her and nudging her a little with her elbow. She shook her head and looked up to Candace, who smiled and looked back to Phineas. "He's still waiting."

"Oh oh, I'm sorry... Yes! Yes I'll marry you! Yes." She flung her arms around him after he put it on her finger... Her friends clapped, Candace did, even Teresa, and her husband had made their way outside were clapping.

"I-I have to talk to Candace a second alright... I'll be right back." It seemed like all his energy had escaped him, but he still had something to do, he kissed Isabella's hand, and walked with Candace to the front of the Camper. "So...?"

"Well Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro was not entirely happy with the idea..." Candace started, and Phineas felt his stomach tighten. Then he relaxed some, "when I told her that it was either that, or Isabella refused to come home... and told her that we were lucky you stumbled upon her camp... that there might not be another chance at finding her again. She agreed, as long as Isabella spends some nights at home with her."

"That was... big of her... I didn't expect that much, really I thought it would be harder." And he did.

"Me too, but I guess when faced with an option like that, it's best to choose the one that everyone will be happy and not just yourself." Candace smiled putting her arm around her little brother's shoulder, leading him back to the camper, to tell Isabella the good news... that she could live with him, and that he didn't have to eat fish for breakfast, everyone wins.

Author's Note: Some of you might notice that I like to start my stories from a week to a couple weeks after the events in in chapter prior to it. I would have posted the next chapter, which is mostly complete now, however... I decided to take another crack at it, and I'm filling in the few weeks prior to the original beginning. So much more fun to write a beginning when the end is completed. Some of you might not like that you'll have to wait for the next chapter, but I have just one thing to say about that... This is my sandbox, and if you don't play nice, I'll take my toys and you can go home. Anyways, for those of you Fans of 'Isabella is that you' Currently this series, and I'd assume you were since you've made it this far. I'd recommend my Gravity Falls fan fiction, 'In the End'. Had a lot of the same emotional struggle, however not as... feeling as my Fairly Odd Parents fan fiction, 'Breaking Point.' So as I said if you like this one, please take the time to read those. Precaution, 'In The End' Is a mature store, for adult situations, and I think language, I can't really remember it's been a while since I've worked on that one.

Also this fiction is now on Hiatus until I get more chapters out for other fictions I'm writing. If you are interested in being a Beta for any of my stories, PM me and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

Am Sadi, The Sadist


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